The Fungus Archipelago

Drawing Together Informal Education and the Teachers Prerogative

2011-01-31T14:46:00.000Z

Drawing Together Informal Education and the Teachers Prerogative

by Marcus Dunning

Informal learning in a museum can be an exciting, fascinating, inspiring, yet conversely a difficult, stressful seemingly unproductive time for children and teachers. Museums such as the Natural History Museum provide fantastic programs to engage and educate schools and families but are their efforts rewarded effectively? Are teachers aware of the programs on offer, and do teachers consider the benefits of an informal education environment worth the effort to arrange and manage? How can a teacher convince their self, parents and their schools that visits like one to the Natural History Museum can be both educational, and practical, be an extension of the classroom and also allowing assessment and progress monitoring? I suggest that the teachers requirements for assessment and evidence based learning, and a Museums programs of education can be more fully exploited by using drawing.

Definitions

What is Informal Learning?

There has been considerable research into efforts to concretely define the terms of 'informal learning' and 'formal learning'. The broad terms have needed clarification and studies like the LSRC’s ‘Informality and formality in learning’ for example, have endeavoured to clarify the issue. Definitive conclusions on the meanings of informal and formal learning are necessary to establish a norm from which further discussion and research can be made. (LSRC, 2003)

Informal learning in a museum for example, provides educational experience that permits a learner to experience objects, artefacts and displays without necessarily having to learn confusing and often unnecessary new terminology. It also motivates the learner to gain personal meaning from their learning, which has greater value and longer lasting memories of the experience. (Gerber, 2001, pp 570)

To effectively cover the literature regarding informal learning in education it is necessary to define informal learning and formal learning.

Learning that takes place in settings outside the classroom is termed ‘informal’ (Maarschalk 1988, Tamir 1990). Informal learning environments are less structured than the formal classroom setting, and management of the learning is shifted from the teachers to the students (Tamir 1990). Informal learning may occur in institutions (e.g. museum, zoo); organizations (e.g. Boy/Girl Scouts, Junior Achievement); or everyday situations (e.g. watching television, taking piano lessons, working on hobbies, shopping for clothes). In essence, the informal learning can be defined as the sum of activities that comprise the time individuals are not in the formal classroom in the presence of a teacher. Informal learning could also include school sponsored extracurricular activities (e.g. sports, band, clubs). (Gerber 2001, pp 570)

Formal learning:

… includes only that knowledge to be acquired in the classroom within a systematic educational setting (e.g. primary and secondary schools, technical schools, colleges, universities). With the curriculum, educating students takes place in organized, systematic ways. The learner and teacher interact with the prescribed intent of promoting learning. A set agenda is implemented and little, if any, importance is ascribed to children’s’ experiences outside the classroom. (Osborne and Wittrock 1983)

Resnick (1987) describes in-school learning as a solitary experience far from applicability to objects or events being represented and removed from real-world experiences. This contrasts to out-of-school learning experiences which focus on group learning, interaction and a greater, deeper development. This view leans favourably towards informal learning over formal.

Colley et al. (2003) disagrees and states that when defining the two, one must be aware that they aren’t isolated experiences. Both have degrees of each other inherent within. When viewed as isolated, opposite styles, it is too easy to see the weakness of one compared to the other, instead of looking at them as attributes present in all learning situations.

It is apparent that with informal learning’s recent popularity it has been assumed it is better quality learning than formal learning. It is important to point out that it has been neglected in the past; its' use now should be to redress the balance rather than be as a superior, format to formal learning. (Billett 2002 as cited in Malcolm et al., 2003)

Informal learning can occur in any situation and place including home schooling. In fact, a child can learn many things by simply living with their family, from tying their shoes to how to boil an egg. (DCC 2007)

Informal Learning as defined by the Natural History Museum

'Museums enable people to explore collections for inspiration, learning and enjoyment. They are institutions that collect, safeguard and make accessible artefacts and specimens, which they hold in trust for society.' (DCMS 2006) In regards to the Natural History Museum (NHM), if compared to a forest walk, as a learning space, it would fall closer to formal than a pure informal learning environment. It has classrooms, interprets the curriculum, self regulates its standards of education and delivery, has staff to plan and coordinate workshops, and interactive talks in and around the museum. In some respects the children may find themselves in very similar surroundings to those they find in the classroom. However, when the children are in the galleries or the Darwin centre they will be in an entirely new experiential environment and be immersed in an informal learning environment. It is therefore difficult to strictly classify the education experiences to be had at the NHM. It is here that the NHM strives to balance the experience of a learner by incorporating all aspects of its available learning spaces in its guided workshops.

The NHM has extensively researched informal learning for its own programs and education model. The research of Berliner has had significant impact upon their workshops and delivery style. Berliner explains his concept of Academic Learning Time (ALT) and how to efficiently deliver material to children in a very constrained time frame. Berliner (1987) stated that in order for an educator to be effective you have to maximize the ALT you have with your learners. That is "...that part of the allocated time in which students are engaged with materials or activities aligned to the outcome measures that are being used and in which students experience a high success rate." (pp 101)

Berliner (1987) explains that ALT is dependent on 5 factors for effective delivery. These are alignment, organization, behaviour engagement, cognitive engagement and success. Alignment refers to whether or not the subject matter is appropriate to the learners, the curriculum and museum objectives. All workshops at the NHM are designed around the curriculum and aimed specifically at the appropriate Key Stages. The best example is the 'Investigate' workshop, which will be covered in detail later in this essay.

The NHM's workshops are designed for prepped learning spaces, quick transitions and specifically designed learning spaces. These aspects of preparation are key to effective behaviour engagement, ensuring a positive learning atmosphere, consistent strategies and clear ground rules for the learners. The programs are also developed to promote questioning, provide a challenge, and are scaffolded to encourage cognitive engagement. When combined these factors will contribute to a greater success, celebrating the learning, applying meaningful praise and ensuring a safe successful learning atmosphere. (Berliner 1987)

These theoretical frameworks for effective delivery are used to assess and manage the NHM's staff and evaluate performance and efficiency. As the NHM and most museums do not have a governing inspection body like OFSTED to be accountable to, the NHM has taken it upon itself to design a self regulatory system, in conjunction with other museums in the United Kingdom.

Semantically speaking the NHM uses the terms Informal Learning for their family and self led projects that schools or small groups can take on at their own pace and without assistance from the museum. The term formal learning or sometimes non-formal learning is reserved for their workshops such as 'Investigate', 'Cutting Edge' and 'How Science Works'. This was explained as a strictly 'in-house' use of the term to alleviate any confusion amongst staff.

Theory

Researchers like Lev Vygotsky and later Jerome Bruner have investigated some very relevant issues regarding informal learning and learning in museums in particular. Both have placed particular importance on culture and cultural artefacts in any form. Vygotsky (1987) believes that language and instruction are essential for the acquisition and evolution of culture. Bruner (1996) feels that one of the main purposes of instruction is to introduce the learner to skills and methods of disciplines and experience them first hand through interaction with people in those disciplines, not only to pass on facts and information. Bruner and Vygotsky suggest that museums are integral to learning experiences when used appropriately in their relevant disciplines to advance understanding and practice.

It is clear people learn in different and contrasting ways, and the research of Howard Gardner reveals that there are at least seven different intelligences to the human psyche. These include linguistic, musical, spatial, bodily kinaesthetic, logical-mathematical, inter-personal, and intra-personal. (Gardner 1983) These facets help explain how people learn to their strengths and suffer difficulties if exposed to modes that they find to be inappropriate to their style. He also addresses the education systems of most western nations lean heavily on linguistic and logical-mathematical modes to the detriment of other modes. Gardner (1991) posits that informal learning environments like museums and science centres are an important part of a learners education, forming a complementary role supporting more formal learning. He compares informal education experiences with formal and finds that the contextual, exciting and enjoyable learning experiences of informal learning are more appropriate to modern learners than traditional formal learning styles.

Further research by David Kolb explores how different people can learn via sensing or feeling things as opposed to people who can learn by thinking something through. These learners may then proceed to actively practice their learning or alternatively reflectively watch other practice. This can be attributed to right brain versus left brain dominance. The right side of the brain governs intuition and non verbal thought, whereas the left side of the brain is concerned with rational, analytical and verbal thought. Museums in particular have taken an interest in this field of research as they have the flexibility to accommodate many learning styles. (Anderson 1999)

Clearly informal learning environments like museums offer great benefit to children studying their specific subject areas. But can a visit to a museum offer a teacher more than a day out of the classroom? Is it possible to assess pupils progress in a variety of subjects from a single days visit to a museum such as the NHM. I believe drawing provides the means to make further practical use of museum visits and offers teachers an avenue of assessing pupil progress.

Research For Drawing

Assessing an informal learning environment can be very difficult. Non-classroom environments, low student teacher ratios, behaviour management, and unfamiliar subject matter all can contribute to an ineffective learning experience. Children may have difficulties focusing, behaving and staying on task in a new exciting environment and as such may not be able to partake effectively in a learning experience. Research has shown that drawing is an excellent tool for focusing and engaging children in many areas.

Studies by Bowker (2007), Barraza (1999), and Glyn and Muth (2008) have shown the positive and concrete evidence that can be obtained from drawing in and outside the classroom. Drawing is a common occurrence in the classroom. Whether it is used as a ‘time filler’, an art activity, performed by the child as a source of pleasure, or used as a means to observe, its use is a firm element in a child’s education. In regards to informal learning and assessment drawing is less utilized.

Drawing has had various purposes in education. Some research has focused on the product, such as art educators, evaluating the content and methodologies involved in production of the drawing. From this researchers have found that stages of development could be found regarding a child’s mental growth. (Arnheim 1954) Others have focused on the psychology of a child’s drawing and a great body of work has been produced to analyze the content in regards to a child’s psychological growth, especially in order to gain insight into their reactions to major events in their life. (Hayes et al. 1994)

Other research has focused instead of the mechanics of a child’s drawing, discovering how they draw, the manner they move around the drawing, and the way they translate the concept to their drawing, preferring things they can relate to and are comfortable attempting to represent. (Goodnow 1977, Lodge 2007)

Hayes et al., (1994) reminds us that the main drawback of much of this research is the fact that most drawing has been done without a physical subject present. Drawing without direct observation fails to address the issue of observational skills demanded in the Nation Curriculum. (DFES 1999) According to Hayes research, when encouraged to draw from an object, to look at the object more than their drawing, the children exercised greater observational skills and a marked increase in their drawings quality. Development of these observational skills directly applies to the requirements of, and satisfies SC1 in the science curriculum. Direct observational drawings are excellent tools to focus children, increase understanding, and improve communication. (Hayes et al., 1994) Most importantly, in regards to this paper it provides a record of learning.

Weber and Mitchell (1996) point out that drawings are a form of text and can be read if the reader has the knowledge required to interpret the drawings correctly. Like writing, drawing can be refined, thus improving the child’s non-textual clarity of communication.

The use of drawing as a means of assessing a child’s knowledge and the acquisition of new knowledge is underused and often overlooked. (Hayes et al., 1994) Mind maps are a more common method to collate what a child knows or has learned in the classroom. Mind maps, although useful, may be a less accessible means of collecting knowledge than drawings, as children who find expressing their ideas in writing difficult, might find drawing a less inhibiting exercise especially when faced with complex problems.

Drawing provides an enjoyable, non threatening activity for children that can be used for communication, understanding and assessment. Table 1 attempts to show how drawing contributes to science in the primary classroom.

Figure 1 (Hayes et al., 1994)

Although drawing has been used as a pre-assessment tool in Hayes research. Some research has been performed to include drawing as a way of measuring the amount and quality of a child’s learning from venues outside of the classroom.

Research done at the Eden Project, Cornwall, (Bowker 2007) showed that drawings made by the children involved provided clear and quantifiable data from the experience. Most previous drawing research has used oral or written assessment of the learning experience, in this case though, the research focused on analysing a child’s drawings prior to the experience and again afterwards. It assessed the depth, breadth, extent and mastery of the project. Gauging success in these areas was measured by comparing the before and after drawings the children made. Marked improvement was clearly made in most areas and the use of personal meaning maps provided a method to plot and record quantifiable data on the amount of learning experienced by the children.

Using pre- and post lesson drawings as a form of assessment was also exhibited in Glynn and Muths (2008) research on the strategic use of drawing in the classroom. They found that pre-lesson drawings showed the possible misconceptions the children may already possess and allowed for them to prepare and correct for this. They also allowed the children to compare their own drawings which concreted their learning making them more aware of what they have learned. Obviously the drawings themselves were records that concretely defined progression and knowledge acquisition. Bowker's work at the Eden Project provides further excellent examples of these findings.

Barraza (1999) examined children’s drawings about the environment with a focus on pressing environmental issues and successfully to establish that there is a cross cultural universal pattern of development to how children draw. This study lays the foundation for application to multicultural classrooms, clearly asserting that children can express themselves in predictable and decipherable ways in their work; thus allowing teachers to read their drawings without the possibility of different cultural backgrounds needing different interpretations.

When applying these techniques to an informal learning environment one simply approaches the lesson with a pre- and post drawing as modelled in Bowker, Glynn and Hayes’s work. The teacher must then note the differences in the drawings, taking into account new information, detail added to existing information, and information the child is keen to include that they didn’t consider before. If time allows, questioning the children about their drawings can lead to further insight into what the child learned. Bear in mind that cultural subject matter may wildly differ and the images drawn will vary greatly between cultures and individual children for that matter, but these things are to be expected. (Barraza 1999)

At the time of writing though, the NHM admits to not having enough information on offer to enable the teacher to fully enact an informed and congruent pre-visit lesson to compare with the workshop and post workshop activities. Consequentially the NHM is currently working on programs that will provide the teachers with pre visit and post visit work. Bowker (2002) mentions in his research that pre-visit work is of utmost importance to ensure children have a foundation knowledge base upon which the museum learning experience will build and expand upon. In order for the assessment and learning experience to be completely realized foundation work in school and follow up work are integral to the learners experience. The NHM recognises the need to have learners prepared for the workshops they present and in order to provide the best learning experience for the learners they do have some resources online for teachers to use. Unfortunately according to the staff at the NHM these tend to be overlooked and the efforts are wasted.

The drawbacks of drawing for assessment would include children with dyspraxia, the sight impaired and those who have a reluctance to draw, stemming possibly from poor self confidence or lack of interest. Obviously these situations would need to be planned for and accommodated accordingly.

Experiences at the NHM

The NHM has a fantastic staff who plan and organize workshops and family sessions. The two workshops I will focus on here are the Cutting Edge and Investigate workshops. Cutting Edge is an exploratory investigation on teeth. Like most, if not all, of the workshops in the museum it lets children handle actual artefacts. Skulls of various animals, from foxes to lions to giraffes, are handed to groups of 5 or 6 children. The children are then tasked to examine the skulls and decide if the skulls in their group are herbivore, carnivore or omnivore. After they decide they are asked how they decided and what factors were important in their decision. This carries on to a discussion on the types of teeth each animal has, and what they are good at eating. The room Cutting Edge is held in lets it down as an informal learning environment. It's reminiscent of a classroom but due to various reasons also resembles a storeroom. Learning environments are integral to defining a formal or informal setting and unfortunately this room remains undecided. It needs to be embraced as a room for learning and decorated as such.

In general the children participating in the Cutting Edge sessions were quite animated and talkative. The talk was on task and although it sometimes was difficult for the Science Educator to maintain a sense of order this was only due to the children's fascination and interest in the subject. Very little off-topic talk was observed. Sadly the weak point of the sessions, was with the visiting class teachers and Teaching Assistants. Having spoken to many of the Science Educators they all expressed a concern over their role as leader/teacher of the workshops. Most of the Science Educators are fully qualified teachers in their own right and are completely capable of managing a classroom. however when an external class enters their teaching space accompanied by the classes teacher and Teaching Assistants, there is a confusion amongst the adults and children as to who is 'in charge'. Ideally, the Science Educator should have full classroom management but it is when behaviour issues arise that the situation becomes difficult. From observation either the teacher takes a back seat entirely, leaving the children to do as they will, and restricting the Science Educators ability to correct behaviour by not reinforcing their desires, or they charge around and restrict the children's experience by crushing all interest and curiosity in the name of order. It is a difficult position to be in as a Science Educator as they are aware that their behaviour strategies can only go so far and then need the support of the visiting teaching staff. For the visiting teacher, by account, they often feel out of their depth in an informal environment and are happy to leave most of the work to the Science educators, but can undermine authority in discipline where they still feel secure in their role as teacher and leader. Pre-visit information is key to solving some of these management issues.

Practically speaking subject specific curriculum based workshops like Cutting Edge will find difficulties in behaviour if the children have already covered the subject matter in class. Some learners will simply lose interest as they believe they already know what is being presented. Consequently their attention will wander and possibly cause others to lose concentration. Schools selecting this workshop should be aware that this is the case but interestingly in 2 of the sessions observed the children had already previously covered 'teeth' and it was clear in their behaviour that they weren't as interested. In the interest of parity, the artefacts presented to the children are new and very interesting and the museum does introduce some new information. At present the development team are aware of this 'repeat learning' problem and are planning rolling workshops, with greater degrees of flexibility to accommodate the different progress levels of the myriads of schools that walk through their doors.

The second workshop observed was the Investigate workshop.* The learning space is relatively new and extremely well appointed. Along one wall are rows of trays filled with clearly labelled artefacts and specimens. The room also has large skulls, stuffed animal specimens and workstations with computer databases. There is also a pond dipping section, microscopes, visualizers, scales and various measuring instruments, all available for the children's use.

The class is ushered into the room and given a 10 minute introduction to the Science Educator and asked to pick a specimen from anywhere in the room and investigate everything they can about it. They are then shown the microscopes, magnifying glasses, visualizers, measuring instruments, scales and notepads on which to do so. They are encouraged to draw, weigh and measure their specimen. At no time are the children told what their specimen is, it is up to them to find out. Throughout the room there are books, and computers with databases on them to aid the children in their investigation. Great emphasis is also placed upon the fact that every specimen in the room is real and the children are encouraged to look through as many as possible.

The investigation takes place over the course of 1 hour and there are usually 1-2 science educators present plus the visiting teaching staff. Key stage 1 and 2 children find this activity to be extremely exciting and thoroughly enjoy the Investigate which clearly utilizes the SC1 mandate of the national curriculum. (DfES 1999) The notepads that the children are given are fantastic records of learning which they can take away with them. Unfortunately most of the observed teachers overlooked this and failed to see the assessment opportunity they presented. When around half an hour to 40 minutes has passed the children are called together to discuss what they discovered. Children are encouraged to speak about the interesting specimen or artefact they drew and measured and tell everyone present what it was and something that they found particularly interesting. Praise and thanks are given to all the children and the science educators dismiss the children to prepare for the next group. Over the course of the workshops hour, I observed some fantastic work being done by the children*. The notepad has drawing as its core activity and the concentration and dedication to the task was impressive. Very few children failed to draw anything at all and many made excellent observations of their specimen.

Teacher interaction with the children was disappointingly limited. Many teachers sat on the side and observed passively, speaking up only to chastise or bring children to task. Whether this was due to disinterest, a perceived notion of unimportance of the task, or reliance on the science educators to take on the role of educator in their stead was unclear. In one particular instance it was unclear which of the 4 adults accompanying the children was the class teacher and which were parents and teaching assistants. The impression given was one of the beleaguered exhausted teacher simple glad for a break from the rigours of the classroom and using the day as an excuse to leave the normal routine and allow someone else to take charge. This is, in my opinion, a complete waste of the enormous opportunities the museum presents not only to the children but the teacher as well in regards to professional development. After having spoken to museum staff they commented that teachers with 'drive' and teachers which are 'switched off' seem to be evenly distributed across the schools that visit.

Although the two different workshops are separate unrelated programmes it is interesting to note that the drawing in Investigate seems, in my observations, to be a integral part of the success of the Investigation workshop. Drawing, as previously explained, focuses the learner, aiding concentration. (Gerber 2001) When asked why they thought drawing was important in this exercise, some responded, 'It helps me look', and one particular child said 'I like drawing and I've never seen anything like this before so I want to draw it!' I would like to see how the Cutting Edge workshop would change if it incorporated drawing into its planning. The children for example could simply and quickly draw on sheets similar to the ones in Investigate, the different teeth that separate carnivores, herbivores and omnivores. Then the children could think about why the teeth are different and how that might help the animals. Drawing from the real, or from direct observation, not only fulfils SC1 objectives but it also serves to heighten a child's ability to observe, notice detail, and helps ensure memory recollection, according to Hayes et al. (1994), and Glyn and Muths (2008).

Both workshops for the most part, depend upon schools booking in advance. The NHM website recommends a pre-visit exercise for Investigate, but doesn't, at present, provide a specific example. It is my opinion that in order for the learning experience at the NHM to be most effective a detailed lesson plan for Key Stages 1, 2 and 3 should be devised by the NHM in conjunction with teachers input. Many schools local to the NHM visit on a regular basis and have good connections with the staff. Such a rapport would be an excellent resource to utilize as a joint venture to develop a limited scheme of work for schools to use in conjunction with the NHM. As stated previously, Hayes et al., Deirking and Bowker all stipulated that informal learning environments must be a collaborative learning experience, working alongside schools and if teachers were given a comprehensive work scheme to apply before visiting the NHM, acquiring evidence during the visit and then resuming a post visit lesson to assess the teachers should be able to assess pupils progress effectively and accurately. Drawing in the pre-visit work would, ascertain exactly what children know about specific species, encourage scientific questioning, creative problem solving, expose previously held misconceptions and prepare them for new and interesting specimens to investigate upon entering the NHM. The drawings made during the workshop (see appendix A) can then be compared to the drawings made before hand and as Bowkers work shows simple quantifiable differences can be examined and compared to discern how much was learned from the sessions. The post visit lesson would entail asking the children to examine their own drawings, recount what they thought they learned and what they discovered that they may have misunderstood previously. The lessons could be a simple as 'Draw your favourite animal(s)' and upon visiting the museum, 'Find your favourite animal and draw it!'. In order to help children draw animals that are easy to find in the museum, a list of suggestions in the pre-visit lesson might help focus their efforts. Further questions like 'What do they eat?', 'What makes them special?' and 'Where do they live?' could be added to the lesson and later referred to once the museum visit has concluded. Assessing what the children learned from their visit would be as simple as comparing the before, during and after work. This sort of lesson planning is something that needs to be developed with both teachers and the museum education staff working very closely together to make certain it runs smoothly.

The scope for assessment of a class's work during a workshop at the NHM is quite expansive. A visit to the NHM would cover Geography, Art, Design and Technology, Literacy, Science, Mathematics and Religious Education and PHSE. With proper foci on each discipline a teacher could in theory assess pupils progress for each of these subjects from one visit to the NHM. For example, exploring how museums are important to the community, how people are expected to behave in museums and how museums help people understand what has happened in the past could be a focus for PSHE.

I was also able to take some time while visiting the museum to view the collections of scientific drawings done during Cooks voyages and Darwin's Beagle voyage of the various specimens and peoples encountered. I was very interested to view the drawings of Fischer and Audubon for their detail, colour and skill is astounding. In some few cases, drawings of species that have become extinct or are not available as skins, are used as Type Specimens, being the best and most accurate representation of that species for the scientific record. Scientific drawing has had a very strong presence since ancient Greece, and later such greats as Leonardo Da Vinci used illustration to inform their viewer. Drawing and science have worked hand in hand and as such should be thoroughly reinforced in the classroom. Having spoken to a few scientists on staff at the NHM, they affirmed that they still use their own drawings as an excellent means of documentation while in the field. Granted, with the rise of digital cameras, drawing is on the decline, but many still believe that drawing benefits themselves for memory aid and more effective observation than simply taking a digital photograph.

Next January, the NHM will be installing a new exhibition exploring the long relationship between Science and illustration for instruction. I was fortunate enough to be able to help in a small way with one of the independent workshops that is being designed for the show. The show will explore the drawings and illustrations from the museums archives. The workshop is designed to allow children to explore the galleries and find their favourite creature. A card and pencil is given to the child and instructions to draw what they see are printed on it. The workshop is geared for KS1 and 2 with different instructions for different age groups. I assisted in the card design and suggested questions to incorporate on it to help the children think about what they are seeing and where that animal comes from. The children's drawings are recorded on the back of the card and will be displayed on a wall for the public to view. Further research into this activity would be of great benefit and perhaps involving school trips with a pre-visit drawing to compare to their drawing that they see in the museum would be very interesting. Hayes et al. (1994) is clear on the fact that drawing from direct observation is a very strong learning aid and I would like to explore that further.

Implications

For my own practice I will endeavour to make full use of drawing, not only as a fun activity for the children to do but also as a regular means of assessing pupils progress. It is clear that people use drawing and are aware of some of its potential but I am also inclined to think that they do not understand the ease and simplicity with which it can be utilized as an assessment tool. The research behind its use for this purpose is clear and strong. I will be certain to centre lessons in Art, English, Maths, Science, Design and Technology, PSHE and any other subject I can possibly use drawing in.

More importantly though, is the use of informal learning spaces. Clearly the cost of using these spaces can become the greatest inhibiting factor, as simply hiring a coach for 30 children can drive costs above parental abilities to pay for the trip. Thankfully recent work has shown that informal learning can take place on the school grounds, in the school corridors and even to a limited extent within the classroom. Introducing children to new and unusual ways of using the spaces they are so familiar with can shift their perceptions enough to bring them to informal learning environments. Welly walks and pattern discovery in classroom architecture and school building architecture are simple ways to enable children to see things differently and cheaply.

Using the informal space as a means for assessing pupils progress is another means of justifying the cost of informal learning. The recent push for APP and assessment in general by both schools and OFSTED would look upon assessment exercises that incorporate informal learning as something more than a simple outing with interest. In some respects it is a matter of convincing both school boards and parents that a trip to the museum is a viable and valuable day out for the children and most importantly as a way to determine their learning development and progression.

Conclusion

Research into informal learning has clearly outlined its value in and out of the classroom. Incorporating the research for drawing as a means of measuring a pupil's learning and progress, means that one can take what was traditionally a difficult environment to enact teaching assessment and create a fun, exciting, and productive means of assessing pupils progress. It is such a simple means to assess and in my opinion heavily under-utilized. Not only does it provide an easy to read and accurate progression of learning it is an activity that children thoroughly enjoy. It provides children with literacy difficulties with an alternative means to express themselves and further develops their communication skills in their education experience.

Work needs to be done in cooperation between the NHM education staff and teachers in all key stages to tailor the efforts into best fit scenarios. When successful workshops are achieved, the museums will benefit from increased attendance from schools who now have a practical tool in the form of drawing for assessment and evidence. This cooperation is most clearly summed up by Dierking and the following quote clarifies the purpose of informal learning in education.

Learning is a result of many complementary experiences – a “dynamic, never-ending, and holistic phenomenon of constructing personal meaning. . . Much of what people come to know about the world, including the world of science content and process, derives from real world experiences within a diversity of appropriate physical and social contexts, motivated by an intrinsic desire to learn” (Dierking et al, 2003).

EVONY Online ------ 4/5 stars!

2009-08-25T14:58:00.003+01:00

Ive been mildly addicted to a little game online called Evony. It's a medieval themed, city building, army building, conquering, farming game. In some ways it is a very elaborate, pretty progress bar.

Its free. In the way that free means you can play all you like but those people who decide to give money to its 'Buy Items' system have a massive advantage. Those who purchase Evony Coins are few and far between as most members pride themselves on their hard work ethic. To me this is both good and not so good. The Evony people are a fairly small outfit and the game has a very large fanbase. The customer service is actually quite commendable. A recent unfortunate downtime resulted in a package for all players to compensate for the inconvenience. As such, given all the time players play and the work involved in maintaining such a large player base, a little monetary thank-you for their product wouldn't be too much to expect.

Ive played a couple of these sorts of games, like O-Game and others. All have a free based system with the option to purchase upgrades or items etc. Not a bad system and it seems the way of online gamings' future. So its not going to fade away anytime soon. What evony has over those games is the chat system. The other games had messaging systems and all but the cumbersome communication made coordinated hits and just plain old chatter and congratulations on any achievements all the more difficult or just useless. You form alliances and wage wars in a much more personal way. You can get get quite involved in the ethos of it all. If it weren't for the chat, the game would be just like the others I've played and lost interest in.

There is a wheel of fortune system as well. Every day you log in you get an 'Amulet'. This can be gambled on a wheel of random loot. Anything from food to armies can be won. The big prizes of course have quite low odds and the lucky are blessed. Amulets can also be bought for 5 evony coins... which is about 50cents US. Its quite amazing how much fun the wheel adds to the game. Every morning you have a lottery ticket of hope! Granted in the grand scheme of things it amounts to nothing, but for the time you spend building farms, looting barbarian cities and pillaging those who are smaller and less well equipped than yourself it adds a lovely random flavour.

The tech tree is strong and exponential in the time and resources required to climb it. First Level items may take 10 minutes but level 10 things can take over a week to research.

Saying that, play evony if you have time to spare. Its not as cut-throat as other games and you don't find yourself slaved to your army to protect it from others as much as say in OGame. Casting a casual eye over things and spending 5 minutes a day just building or researching can be all you need. Or you can babysit every progress bar and scout every town for plunder to maximize your progress up the merit system.

Evony has its failings as well though. Its recruitment idea 'IEvony' mildly backfired and caused a public backlash against spam invites. Members are allowed to invite people themselves and gain coins for those who sign up. Some people have, of course, abused the system and mass spammed, giving Evony bad press. Evony themselves have now taken action to restrict use and amended policies regarding the system.

The game lacks just a little bit of polish. Spelling errors and grammar problems are the first to come to mind. Its clear the game was developed in a non native English environment. Some leniency can be granted there... but by now those errors should have been found and corrected.

The other main and common complaint is the merit system. To advance levels and unlock the ability to build/attain more towns you need to collect 'Medals'. For the most part these are found in battles. Unfortunately the drop rates are very low and in some cases less than 1 in 50 battles will leave a medal. The fan base has done some amazing work researching where you can find the medal you need but it basically falls to the old strategy of grinding found in so many games.

The system is understandable... Evony is a business after all, and must do its best to maintain its player base. But a little more creativity in attaining medals, making it seem a little less, 'head meets brick wall.. repeat' and little more VERY hard but not impossible wouldn't go amiss.

All in all though, I've enjoyed my first month in Evony. Being of an addictive nature it falls to me to balance my personal life with PC time but hey, if it wasn't good I wouldn't be so drawn to the damn game :) Check it out and have look round. Find an alliance! The advice your peers can offer is invaluable. If your on server32 look for pravo22!

Cheers!

p

Culture Show!

2008-05-20T11:12:00.002+01:00

Lo all 2 of my pieces were accepted to the BBC's culture shows' grand relaunch! Im chuffed as a chuffy thing!

Check it out!

Marcus dunning

As seen on NWW... more info there

2007-08-07T16:30:00.001+01:00

Terrian and toys!

2007-07-24T15:37:00.000+01:00

2007-07-11T00:04:00.000+01:00

New Shoes!!

2007-05-13T12:04:00.000+01:00

Yours isn't dead yet... kill it

2007-01-23T00:14:00.000Z

Nuclear Winter Wonderland

2006-12-19T23:50:00.000Z

Hi all,

Ive decided to move the gallery over to a little used and now revamped ghost site I've had for a while. Its previous use has come to and end and now its the new and improved home of my prints!

Go have a look!!

Nuclear Winter Wonderland

My Flat

2006-12-04T22:24:00.000Z

Id thought id share with you my flat... heres a series of pics of my place... im quite proud of it and even keep it tidy!!

On the Scene - Revisited

2006-12-03T18:56:00.000Z

Hello all!

Once again i must apologize for my horrid lack of commitment to yourselves! But ive been very busy, had a nasty cold, and starting new social life. So i beg some leeway. :P

Just finished a date with a lovely girl. Thats what the title is referring to. I was set up on a blind date ummm... last weekend i think with a good friends girlfriends friend.

The 'date' went well as far as i can recall.. it was a pub quiz couples thing. And i must say i was my most charming eloquent sassy self. I recall making a fair few jokes and failing monumentally to impress with my pub quiz knowledge. Im crap at them... it doesnt help im not british tho. :)

So at the end of the date i forgot to get her number. Her name is Kate btw. It just didnt occur to me to be honest. That and even if it did i would have been a bit chicken.

So my mate gave her my number (hehehe no onus on me!) and she proceeded to text me not long after. We went for coffee this evening... a short sweet meet n greet to see what makes her tick. Shes a lovely, tall leggy blonde primary school teacher.

-------------------------------------------------

Previously in this space there was a mean diatribe based on a false first impression. I have removed that. The impression was read by people i never thought would read it... in my stupidity... and hurt those people. People I REALLY didnt want to hurt and people who dont deserve my thoughtless literal drivel. I've already apologized but will again here. I am MASSIVELY sorry, and moreso feel a complete asswipe. I reckon my future posts for Fungus will be less personal on the OTHER people personal side of things. This place is about me,.. not about other people and to judge is to be judged. I deserve the judgements for what i wrote here and dont blame anyone for thinking badly of me. I would were i in their shoes. If they decide to forgive me or give me a second chance... well... they are better people than I. I can't expect such grace and but sincerely hope they do offer the hand of friendship. Once again i am truly sorry more than you can know.

And no im not just saying things to slimeball my way back into good graces. I never have nor will i ever. I accept responsibility for my words and actions and must take the lumps for those words and actions. I'm Sorry Kate and was remarkably wrong.

crap... ive tried to edit this so its more obvious but im on a mac here and have no idea how its handling Blogger... sorry.

-------------------------------------------------

yesterday i was sitting in starbucks... as i do... studying my japanese when an asian girl wandered in and sat down a table away. I was sneaking glances at what SHE was studying and deduced she was japanese! yay! so when i came to a bit of japanese i wasnt clear on i politely asked her if she was japanese and if she could help me... in japanese of course :) <---- smooooth

And so i met Yuko! after a half hour she had moved to my table and we were helping eachother with our respective languages! We have a date for next week at the local noodle bar :) CHACHING... shes quite cute and around 5ft tall... i stood up to go and was shocked cuz i felt SO tall! like i was wearing platform shoes. Shes also gonna introduce me to her japanese friends... hrrrr. Realisitically speaking... we have nothing in common and shes actually too short... its kinda weird. But shes lovely too and a new person in my life!!

And last week i went on a school field trip with the MEd Students to the Eden project. Some of you long time readers might remember last years trip and photos. I didnt take any photos this year cuz i didnt feel like it. I spent most of the day in the company of Sylvia. Shes Half Cypriot Greek and half Czech. Lovely girl... dark hair medium build sweet face. Shes quite nice but wont be around for long. Nevertheless i will make a good friend and hang out.

So thats the synopsis on my newfound social life. Its been a tad whirlwindy.

The professional side of my life is looking at change too. Im starting a masters program next summer in Masters of Ed TESOL. Teaching English. Im not going to get the full masters in it just the certification. The FULL masters will start next fall in Film. Both will be part time and should be loads of fun. The sweet sweet bonus is that the uni said it will finance both. YAY! So my 5 year plan (at the outside) is to get both of those done... should really only take me 2 years i reckon and the ill move off this fungal rock and find a new shore to wander upon. Most likely Japan.

There ya go... mucho news to sate the palate since ive been sooooo very delinquent. Hope you are all well!!!

cheers

m

A new Arrival

2006-10-29T00:04:00.000+01:00

I am the proud owner of a brand new bouncing baby sofa. Yes, tis true... 9 months ago after a rather alcoholic night of debauchery I found myself in a compromising situation with various household furnishings. Not being one to shirk my duties as a responsible parent i have taken it upon myself to shoulder the burden of fatherhood. Please congratulate me upon my good fortune.

I think it looks like its mother... hopefully it will have my brains.

ps... the toilet roll was for my NOSE. perverts

So tired

2006-10-18T11:32:00.000+01:00

Well its well past time for me to update fungus. I havent forgotten you my reader(s).

Life is progressing. Not sure where its going at all though to be honest. More and more i get the feeling that the expiry date on my sojourne here in the archipelago is coming due. Ive tapped the mine of experiences so to speak. Or at the least ive finished a vein of lode of crap. hehe.

The choice that presents itself now is should i start looking for a new start here? i have a lovely flat and all that but as far as friends go i think i may have to start a new circle somehow. The ones i have well... im not keen on being super close to them so i need to find someone who would fit that bill.

Sometimes i wonder. Culturally speaking i prize my 'fly on the wall lifestyle', looking at the UK from without.. or at the least off to one side. And recently its come to my attention that perhaps the idea of a Friend is culturally different than what i grew up with. Now thats a rather large assumption as perhaps my childhood friendships.. and later werent typical. I think they are though. But as far as i can tell most people here have a circle of people they know, drink with, and occasionally share gossip with over a cuppa tea. Those kinds of people i would still call friends but not with a capital F. If the chips are down they dont want to get involved or whatever.But the friend or definition of a friend that i know is more than that. And Im not entirely sure that that sort of person is easily found here.

The age old stereotype of the Stiff Upper Lip Brits is still true. Its evolved over time but in general getting to the core of a person on a friend level is EXTREMELY difficult. There is a definate lack of trust. Now of course im only making these observations from my own personal experiences and perhaps its coincidental that the people i know hide a large part of who they are. Im sure they have their reasons. But when it comes to being a close friend with them the trust needs to be there... i automatically trust people (stupidly) and i guess i take it personally when it isnt reciprocated. its probably not intended personally, but just a tool for coping with life. So i tend to meet and try to get to know people who make that process a lot like an obstacle course. The thing is, am i that interested in them and they in me, to make that obstacle course worthwhile? Im just talking about mates here... i thought mates and friends should be an easy thing. get to know someone... like them... they like back.. you hang out and do shit. but if everytime you meet theres a strange tension as one of them is holding back or something and the other is wondering wtf is going on... then is that a friend.

i too keep a part of me for me... but at the same time... i dont. Now that i feel is my own failing. And one of the reasons i end up hurting myself or putting myself in situations where i risk emotional ... uupsets. Im not sure failing is a good word... but if my heart on my sleeve attitude serves only to present an easy target then perhaps i am doing something wrong. Of course parents and friends back home would disagree.

I think i need to learn self preservation. And the events of this year have really pounded that concept into me.

.....

..... wow reading back that is seriously a lot of wandering nonsense... well at least unstructured sense that resembles nonsense in such a way that it could be mistaken for nonsense. :)

Anyways, life... ya.. well ive made a few important personal decisions and set a few plans for my future. Of course the plans hinge on things out of my control so i need to just relax and let whatever is supposed to happen... happen. Hopefully those happenings have something to do with my plans :)

For instance... my japanese. Im loving it. Its reviving my mind, making me think and satisfying in the way that you can see your progress as you turn the pages of your textbook. Given a billion dollars id probably study everything until it was gone. Im starting to think that the japanese is a means to an end. Albeit an end thats a way off... but I think i might end up spending time in Japan. Ive always had a pulling in that direction and if i want to live life to the fullest i better let myself be pulled!

So ya thats one of the things thats wandering through this convoluted head of mine. The rest of it is trying to stop fixating on things and people i can do nothing about. I find myself getting angry and dont like it. I dont want to be a bitter person... that frightens me a bit. I just need something sweet in my life to take the edge off :) So hope for the future and perhaps a good person to hang out with. That would be lovely.

cheers!

m

ps.. o ya... im super pooped cuz work is absolutely insanely busy and its all i can do to stay up past 9:30pm these days!

The high road sucks

2006-09-29T09:08:00.000+01:00

Well its been a while since i vented and ranted because I havent had anything really upsetting happen to me lately. But guess what? Now i DO have something. lucky me.

Yesterday I found out that Qtip has a new boy. O but hes not new! Hes the guy she was chatting to online before we broke up. And looking back its obvious he was planting seeds of doubt and poison in her head/heart that definately didnt help our situation at the time. I really dont like this guy.

So 3 months after qtip and i ended things she went to him. No wonder she didnt want to talk to me. No wonder she seemed to be ok with the breakup... she had someone else to cushion her fall in the form of a rebound.

The shitty part is not that shes found someone new. I knew that would happen and had mentally prepared for it. What i wasnt prepared for was the lies and deceit and COWARDICE that surrounded the whole thing. I got some mail that had both our names on it that I needed to consult qtip about. So i called her flat last night. she wasnt home. HE was tho. So ya... i didnt find out from qtip i found out from him. Isnt that just great. I called qtips cell and told her... all i got was a ... o... err ya i was thinking i should call you. You were THINKING IT?! After EVERYTHING i did for her... the love compassion care and self sacrifice she didnt even have the freaking DECENCY to tell me herself? She played the chickenshit card ONCE again. Hiding from her responsibilities as an adult and ignoring the possibility that she could hurt other people ONCE again. I should have seen this coming. I know her. 'I need to be alone' she said... numerous times... all the time she was seeing someone else. if she thought she was protecting me shes sadly mistaken. It makes me doubt her character. I didnt deserve this treatment and never have i been so poorly treated like this in my life. by anyone.

Heres the added insult to injury. all my friends knew she had a new guy... months ago. And did they tell me? no. Did they lie to me. yes. 'o well i didnt want to hurt you... blah blah bullshit. They wouldnt have hurt me. i dont shoot the messenger. They would have proved their friendship and at least ASKED if i knew. 'We didnt want to get involved... too fucking late.. you were involved the moment she told you. She was hoping youd tell me. I would much rather have heard from a friend than from her new guy. They knew qtip wouldnt tell me. So who would have then huh? my 'friends' thats who. O but no... they chickenshitted out as well. Well trust has been lost.

One friend said she didnt feel it was her place. I understand that. but they also knew that qtip wouldnt tell me so as my friend i would have hoped they could have stepped up. I would do the same for them, as i wouldnt want them to find out the hard way or look like a fool.

Ive been robbed of dignity and feel like a patsy. The last to know. I feel like ive been made a fool of and disregarded in the cruelest of ways.

I try very hard to live my life without regrets and to leave bitterness for lemons. But this is making it very difficult. I dont want to hate anyone... but this is making it hard. I dont want to think poorly of anyone but qtip is really pushing it. I know if go down this road its only a hop skip and a jump to thinking that i wasted the 3 years i spent with qtip. That all we went through was for nothing. She didnt learn anything and all i got to show for it was being a fool. Im trying VERY VERY hard not to walk that low road. I was raised to take the high road... to forgive and forget.
Im going to try. but its not easy nor very gratifying in that petty sense.

All that said... you may find it hard to believe i still am actually glad she HAS moved on. She has found some happiness. Although im afraid it wont last. She is trapped in denial and although her problems are at bay they will return. Worse than before. She will leave a wake of relationship wreckage behind her. She needs to love herself before she can be loved or truly love another. As soon as she finds herself losing control she will push the man in her life away ... until its impossible to stay. Im not the first shes done this to. nor will i be the last. I pity her boy. and i pity her.

I asked her to call at a better time as when i last spoke to her she was at work. She wont call. and right now im not sure i want to hear from her. But its probably best if i do.

At least this has closed the book on any sort of attempt to salvage a friendship out of this. I dont want to have a friend who treats me this way. Lies and cowardice. The door on that possibility has slammed shut.

Im gonna go now and try to find out a way to get rid of the poison thats flowing through my veins now.

If you actually read all this... im impressed. but dont mind if you just went... blah emotional crap again.

cheers

p

Made a new... lamp?

2006-09-23T20:10:00.000+01:00

Hi all... finally finished my lamp sorta thing! have a look!

New Flowers!

2006-09-18T19:46:00.000+01:00

No Im not gay... but I love gerberas.

OMG OMG OMG EEEEEEEEEEEEEK!

2006-09-14T10:19:00.000+01:00

ok i just screamed and squealed and jumped up and down in a very very panicked and freaked out way... all because THIS WAS CRAWLING ON MY NECK!

Man instict is a freaky thing. now i got the creepy crawlies and everything itches... i hope it didnt lay eggs in my ear.... *shiver*

I made a quiz...

2006-09-14T10:07:00.000+01:00

Think you know me? How could you... im still trying to come to grips with the reality that is me... doesnt help that i change so often. But at the very least you can have a crack at this quiz i made... its shamelessly self aggrandizing. and all about me! If you feel like it you can comment here after youve taken it and tell me off or brag or whatever.

http://www.chatterbean.com/createyourownquiz/myquiz.php?qid=48327

2006-09-06T15:20:00.000+01:00

Check em out. My new loves.

for meeeee??? aw thanks!

2006-08-29T17:54:00.000+01:00

Renaissance Movie Trailer

2006-08-15T13:01:00.000+01:00

Paris 2054. Ilona Tassueiv, a young and brilliant researcher is violently kidnapped. Avalon, a giant multinational corporation and her employer, wants her found at any cost. Dellenbach, Avalon’s CEO, has requested that Officer Bartholomew Karas, a hostage retrieval specialist and the most controversial cop in the force, be in charge of the case... Directed by Christian Volkman, voice cast includes: Daniel Craig, Romola Garai, Jonathan Pryce, Kevork Malikyan, Ian Holm & Catherine McCormack

Undead Bed

2006-08-09T18:18:00.000+01:00

The latest print... just off the press... although it looks ok here the actual print needs a redo as the laquer is a bit messy in areas... i was in a hurry ... stupid me.

Books

2006-08-08T23:24:00.000+01:00

Ok books... love em. But not sure if they have such an impact on me that they seem to others... but heres a good stab at figuring it all out. By the way, im not big on recommending books as i feel it somehow cheapens them... perhaps im just really selfish or knew someone who pointedly refused to read anything i recommended as a rule.

A book that changed my life:

Well... that would have to be Lao Tzu's Tao Te Ching TIED with The Tao of Pooh by Benjamin Hoff. Both comfort and provide me with insight into something better than me.

A quote from Pooh,

Cottleston, Cottleston, Cottleston Pie
A fly cant bird, but a bird can fly.
Ask me a riddle and I reply:
Cottleston, Cottleston, Cottleston Pie

A book I've read more than once:

Whoa, LOADS of em... but the first one that springs to mind is The Hitchikers Guide to the Galaxy and all the other ones... i have them in one lovely leather bound fat fat edition of loveliness. Whenever I'm bored or hanker for a laugh... i can NEVER go wrong. hehehehe pangalactic gargleblasters.

and yes of course the Lord of the Rings Trilogy... too many times.. before it was a film and super pop-culture i was quietly proud of my two digit readings over the years... now im just a closet geek. Looking in my bookshelf, which has been pared down over the years due to several very long distance moves, it mostly contains those books I either spent too much money on, knew I'd read again and again or just haven't taken to the second hand book store yet. The good ones are the complete collection of Haruki Murakami whom ive just finished reading and am waiting for the newest to go to paperback. (i HATE that wait), quite a few by Iain M Banks, some shitty sci-fi fantasy crap... a fair few russians, and ashamedly pop-lit self helpers like The Life of Pi, which although i loved it, lets face it... it was a fuzzy warm self helper.

Speaking of self help books, if its at all possible get your hands on Generica by Will Ferguson (yes the canadian ferguson of the ferguson bros. ) I laughed and loved it. Anything that takes the piss outta americans is fine by me. hee!

right, on with the show...

A book that made me laugh:

ooooo ya! totally forgot him! Paul Auster! i have a very difficult time getting my hands on anything by him over here in the archipelago... but i have whiled many an hour away in Chapters with a coffee on a sofa reading books that i could never afford to buy. Most of whom were Paul Auster's. The one that made me laugh my ass off was Mr. Vertigo. In fact I believe I actually bought that one... it impressed me so much. I will forgive his penchant for Baseball (but respect its modern day equivalent to oral history) Other very funny books are of course The Hitchikers Guide, and the other day i got a weird look from a girl in the laundromatt when i was laughing at Sputnik Sweetheart by murakami... cant recall that it was all that funny really but i did get caught out.

A book that made me Cry:

Erm... I actually try to avoid books like these... I guess I am wrong... i am affected by books, as books with particularly gut wrenching, heart leaking, eye throbbing emotion really take a lot out of me. Im not particularly super cheery. Dont get me wrong I not a damp rag on the fires of life but recently things havent been exactly... superduper.* As such I avoid them like the plague. Thinking back though I am having a difficult time thinking of any really moving-in-the-sad-department books. OOO YA!! back in highschool or junior high or something... I bawled like an abandoned redheaded stepchild when i read Flowers for Algernon. I console myself in the fact that most people have shed a tear for Algernon. DONT DENY IT! if you do I may have to reassess my gay to not gay ratio... please dont make me do that.

Okay down to 5 ciggies... and one of those is the morning smoke! so actually four... including the one in my mouth... i better get things moving here.

A book that I wish had been written:

what??? the thing i love about books is the discovery! wishing one had been written is like reading the last chapter and thinking.. ya well that was dumb. If one i wished to be written WAS written i wouldnt be able to read it as i would already know what it was all about and as such in a sense had already written it in my head. and unless I wrote it i couldnt read it again as it would be heavily spoiled. I dont speak to hear the sound of my own voice at all (as half the time I'm not really aware of what Im saying... or how loud) but i confess to re-reading my own words and... yes... laughing at my own pathetic whittiness. Literal Narcisism. great... just add that to paranoia, melancholy, and mild neuroticism. huzzah... im retarded.

So if i read my own words the book i wish was written would be my own book. I have a title and everything! In fact, in some ways this blog is groundwork for it. The title is The Sadly Comic Misadventures of an Over-Sensative Boy. The cover will have a caricature-derivative of me, with a shovel, standing in a mushroom field, with a silhouette of a hairdressers razor howling in a full moon behind me. There may also be a bottle of gin and evil looking cigarettes. and tire tracks. and maybe a dribbling dirty french man in a string vest with beef-tea stains on it wringing his hands in a corner muttering 'hrrrarr.. phshazza.. meh'. Or none of that at all... just a 50ft animatronic Legoman destroying London. ya... i like that. he has to have the manically/beautifically/brainwashed grinning face too. the normal lego smile.

A book I wish was never written:
Um... I know i've read some absolute crappers in my life.. but none really stand up and say 'burn the author while making him/her eat me till he chokes/immolates to death'. crap.... 2 smokes left.

Googling 'the worst book ever written' came up with Mein Kampf... which i disagree with... its a necessary mirror to the nazi/adolf's mindset by which we can measure cultural/social norms against. and apparently Jesse Jameson and the Golden Glow: Bk.1 (Jesse Jameson S.) by Sean Wright is pretty bad... but then... what does some loser on amazon know eh? I think the worst book ever written is probably anything with Elmo from sesame street in it. I hate the little red demon.

Books I'm currently reading:
hrm... the last of the Murakami titles 'Underground'... which is frankly a little dull... more of a documentary/commentary on the gas attacks in tokyo in '92. I'm also reading H.P. Lovecraft's 'At the Mountains of Madness and other Novels of Terror'.. which isnt scary at all and I'm only reading him to justify my use of Cthulhu in one of my prints... who hasn't even been MENTIONED yet i might add. Also reading Demons by Dostoevsky.... which I reckon i will be trying to finish until i die. And re-reading 'The New York Trilogy' by Paul Auster. Its my laundry day book. I have Nietzche's Twightlight of the Idols/The Anti-Christ in the bathroom and sorta try to read him but he's a bit of a freak. I also got this really cool Chinese Literature Monthly (not in circulation) short stories collection from a second hand bookshop/antiques shop from 1964 that has really interesting stories post WW2 in rural china. and it smells really awesome... that old book smell you get in really old librarys like Trinity College in Dublin.

Thats about it really... im forever picking something up and dropping it again after a few chapters only to return to it and have to back a chapter or 2 up to remember who's who and what's what.

A book(s) I've been meaning to read:

Demons by dostoevsky... it is my literal demon... it haunts me... it torments me... it sits there smugly and chunkily on my cheap flatpack bookshelf taunting me with its smooth quality paper and bold DEMONS on the spine. my nemesis... my Delilah.

Shock of the New... because as an artist apparently i am deficient if i havent read it.

A book on post-modern christianity my Dad asked me to read and I am mildly curious as to what it talks about. Don't have it to hand to get the title though.. sorry.

Underworld by Don DeLillo upon recommendation... apparently a peer of Paul Auster.

A Short History of Tractors in Ukrainian by Marina Lewycka... the best title EVER for a fiction novel, and it always catches my eye in the book store... those books never fail me. yet.

The Catcher in the Rye - always seems to flee my mind in the bookstore and library... but always one i want/ed to read.

The Satanic Verses - Salman Rushdie because I've heard so much about it and may even be more poignant in the world today... stupid crap library never has it in though.

Dante's Divine Comedy and Goethe's Faust. As you do.

As i light up the last stupid self loathing cigarette of the evening... er... morning.. (CRAP another late night... looks like a nap in the back room tomorrow at work) i will say nitey nite! Maybe tomorrow i will link all the titles to Amazon like other very keen bloggers have done and I will tag two people whom I am curious about their reading habits.

Special thanks to Lolabola for the tag as i really enjoyed writing this post and will probably enjoy re-reading it tomorrow as I am really quite pathetisad. (I coined that word... but you may use it)

TAG you're it Mike, Ed and SIC

cheers!

p

ps. damn i hate it when hyperlinks underline... cant seem to get rid of em... and now this post looks like a freakin ad for amazon.

* note the use of an outdated word... it will become really cool again

Not sure what to call this one - Evil Eye maybe?

2006-08-03T15:00:00.000+01:00

Yes tis true... two prints in one day! The Sexiness is overwhelming... i know.

Squish You're Dead

2006-08-03T12:52:00.000+01:00

heres the next installment of the Kitchen plates. This ones called Squish You're Dead

Im planning on 3 diff plates, each with 3 various nme's doing various nme things. My scanner either sucks or my monitor does as the colors on the images are MUCH punchier irl.

Cheers!

m

Kitchenscape - pixellated

2006-07-26T11:30:00.000+01:00

Ok heres the tentative final piece for Kitchenscape. Im quite happy with it but im also very tempted to take the plate on to another more technical etching sans the pixels. Not sure yet tho.

I quite like the fact you can see the etching through the images, i feel it lends an amorphous quality... like the characters arent quite in the same space. what do you think?

new proof sans pixels

2006-07-25T09:20:00.000+01:00

this one has yet to be endowed with pixellated death commandoes but i really really like the result so far so i thought id share.

2006-07-21T08:48:00.000+01:00

The gods have spoken! Duh duh Duhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

I just received a politely worded respond to my application for that job in Calgary. It was a negative. I really havent had time to sit down (well I am sitting but you know) and mull this over yet. Things like this take a bit to clarify for me. Right now my thoughts are like a pond surface in a sharp rainstorm.

I think its a good thing. Well actually i think either result would have been a good thing. I was leaning towards this response anyways and now can actually start making a life here. Or die trying.

Not sure what else to write yet... but ill ponder and let you all know!

Im staying in the Fungus Archipelago.

cheers

p

Test print Preview

2006-07-19T12:08:00.000+01:00

Alo all

Heres a preview of my WIP for the new project series... PAHLEEEASE critique it...

Click for bigger image

Cheers!

p

Teetering on the Edge

2006-07-15T17:15:00.000+01:00

I think it was Oscar Levant who said 'Theres a fine line between madness and genius. I have erased this line.' Not sayin im a genius or nothing.. but in some ways the removal of a line of definition is more reassuring than knowing which side of the line you lie... The removal of the line removes the concern for ones mental state. This fuzzy land of grey shades is much more relaxing... sort of like staring at television static and finding figures in the chaos. TV static is modern mans/womans firegazing... sure we all can still firegaze, more-so if you like camping or happen to be an avid piromaniac... but in our everyday lives we dont get access to a truly 'free' fire. Yes i know loads of people with those gas fireplaces in their homes... ceramic lookalike logs and trendy modern fixings... those arent free fires... those are fabricated... they dont count.

BUT everyone i know... bar a few oddies and really poor people, has a tele... and all they have to do is disconnect it and you have static! YAY! try it sometime soon... disconnect the signal and stare at the static... like u used to as a kid.. get up real close... bathe in the cathode ray goodness... close enough to see the red green and blue things.. and just disconnect your brain... you see things and no-things. That fuzzy grey state lives in the static... nothing matters there.. its almost a tangent from reality for me. if you have one of those crap tv's that makes static a blue background... turn that option off :P

In ancient Sanskrit/Hinduism/Bhuddism, and also possibly the roots of zen, Shiva had a lover named Devi... they have these long winded conversations on enlightnenment... one of the passages they talk about breathing and that little space of no-thing between breaths; at the height of the breath, where you stop inhaling and start exhaling and the bottom of the breath where you stop exhaling and return to inhaling... those peaks and troughs... that instant split second of time... thats the greyness too... that tiny little place where time stops and mental state becomes null and void. That place... like losing yourself in static... is where the dividing line between and 'cookoo for cocopops' and ordinary man, once erased, becomes a reassuring state of stillness.

Ok dont bother rereading all that... i think its way too rambly and disjointed to make ANY sense... but it sorta just came to me... i think i need to start meditating again.

All that stuff i just wrote was inspired by the upcoming dividing line in my life. Monday i will (supposedly) know whether or not i got a job in Canada. Or so i have been told. Up untill now, I've been wavering and fluffing up my life. Once that line is crossed and a decision made... i will have direction for the first time in... well... years... at least. Thats scares the ever loving shit outta me. But its also exciting.

Obviously i can't erase this temporal line on monday... although if the Monster Raving Loony Party here in Britain got into power they WOULD abolish mondays... its in their charter... as well as February's as they are too cold. I think i should sign up... they rock. I digress... so this event horizon is looming. Deep down... part of me is still undecided... but i find myself leaning towards making a life here... in the fungus archipelago that I call Britain. Sure, my friends have moved on or are about to... and i have to disentangle myself from certain people i love/care so much about so that being with them hurts too much... but this is LIFE. like i said in a previous post... you can't run from it... it just comes back pissed off.

Today i measured out the dimensions of my flat and went to two local department stores looking at beds... this was exciting! I found these two;

Bed number 1
Bed number 2

Bed 1 is from Debenams... a large retail department store... sorta bog standard and not really much to wow about.. it is affordable tho and has a very very easy payment plan... bed, sidetable and mattress are on sale.

Bed 2 is from Habitat... sort of an upmarket Ikea... very shiek and cooool... much more my style but a bit more money.. the payments would be twice as much but i would also get a really cool underbed drawer thingy, and sidetable. I gotta spend £1k to get the good payment plan. I'm very tempted by this bed... very very. I'd pay it off in a year... and all that includes a very good mattress. It is also on sale.

Now, reason or desire? and of course is there even a point? I can only make a decision after the job thing pans out but this sorta stuff really takes my mind off of the poo and makes me think i can really make a go at making a life for myself. Sure its all material crap but it does represent me making a serious go of being a grownup, or at least it does to me.

Oh, and that leads me wonderfully into my new art project! Actually it doesnt but I dont care.
I started a new print (one of a few in this current line of reasoning) this week! I have to thank Duncan for this one as he gave me some really great advice, and paj as his work helped me move into this train of thought. chooo chooooo! Im not sure if i want to divulge too much at this early stage as i have only done one bite/proof and have yet to iron out kinks but this work is really quite the stretch for me and im quite excited about it! I just hope its as successful as i want it to be :) I will definately keep you posted and put the first final proof up for youre critique! eeeee! so excited!

Well I thought id let you all know whats what in Pravoland. And now I have. I always feel bad writing this much... especially when half of it is mumbo jumbo stupid shit... but there ya go... its my blog and i can say whatever i freakin want :P

loads of love n cuddles

p

Growing pains

2006-07-11T08:47:00.000+01:00

Its funny, I always assumed, without really thinking about it, that people grow up year by year. You get more mature and wise as the years tick past. But the reality of it is that you just bumble along until something comes into your life and forces you to wake up and smell the Mortgage in a rather rough and rude sort of way. You grow up all at once.

I think i may have to do this. Ive always pretty much shied away from the whole 'adult thing'. You know, being serious about a job and thinking like older people and planning for retirement, considering RSP's or ISA's. Possibly ive avoided all that because im pretty crap at that sort of thing.

Im facing a decision. Next monday I will know whether or not a life changing job will be offered to me. Its a very big decision as it involves moving back to Canada, calgary to be precise.

Of course if i dont get the job the choice is nonexistent and i stay where i am. But if it is offered to me, then i have to really sit down and think very hard about pros and cons and future security and standards of living and blah blah blah! SEE!? old people stuff!!

My emotional chronology has been as rocky as ... a really rocky thing. back in may i was mostly convinced i should run with proverbial tail between legs and hide hide hide. course thats never a really good way to deal with life is it... it always finds you and is usually as pissed as a fatass cop whos had to chase you 3 blocks. After i got back from canada and saw all my friends and chilled i gained a little perspective. I also got rejected by a girl... in pretty much the nicest way ive ever been rejected... that makes it sound like thats happened alot... fair enough.

anyways as the drama unfolds, i reckon staying is better than going... i have the luxury in my position to make art alot. i wouldnt in canada. ive still got a few things to mull over and i think i might take a weekend off in cornwall, sit on the beach, watch the waves and really get down to serious thinking and decision making stuff. either that or ill hit on some surfer chick. or mebbe 2.

I really need to start a real life... ive been practically living out of my suitcase for 4 months... and its time i settle. As comfy as they are... inflatable mattresses dont instill a sense of security and solid character in a woman. nor does the lack of any furniture whatsoever... and i would actually like to have a woman whos keen on being with me for a change. how novel.

well, thats the lowdown in a gisty sort of way. if you have any further questions ill be happy to answer then in detail if you ask. :P

cheers

p

Tate St Ives

2006-06-26T14:45:00.000+01:00

Last week i wandered down to Cornwall and visited the Tate St. Ives and the Barbara Hepworth Museum and Gardens. The Tate was lovely... tiny and intimate with two modernist retrospectives and a lovely selection of etchings/seriography available to purchase. To be honest, at first i was a little disappointed in the Tate St Ives... bear in mind my expectations were on the grand scale (perhaps naively) with the Modern in mind. The exterior facade of the Gasworks building hints at a huge interior of white spaces interrupted with art. Huzzah! Another point for architecture dwarfing is purpose! BUT once you enter the building you are shunted down a hall with reprints of modernist artists for sale... around a corner and tadaa you are in the Resident Gallery room... sure you get to see a Naom Gabo and a Hepworth and Ben Nicholson, all interesting pieces in their own right, but the 60sq ft room seems to be a minimal gesture.

Then you are presented with a strange spiralesque staircase that leads to the retrospectives up and down. I wont go into the retrospectives, I thoroughly enjoyed them but they arent the subject here... its the Tate itself.

The light and bowed glass windows add a lovely fishbowl feel to the work on display and although st ives is noted for its Mediteranean light, come on people... its friggin england... grey skys were always on order here. The intent was great but at the same time it lets the work down more often than not. Again, it seems the architecture of the Tate 'powers that be' is more important than the works its housing. Sure its indy-culturally sensative, and sure its avant garde, but really, its detracting. The coolest room was the courtyard which was filled with a sealed marquee (most likely full of shovels, whitewash/emulsion, and other crap).

The Tate modern suffers from similar problems. They commission artists to glorify the main space. Not fill it... the only show ive seen that successfully pulled attention away from the stratospheric space was Anish Kapoor's Marsyas... and that was because it completely obstructed any view whatsoever of the space it inhabited. It filled and threatened in such a way that you forgot you were in the tate. Personally i didnt like Marsyas... I couldnt get Alien Condom outta my head. Perhaps Im a pervert. LOL theres no perhaps about it is there.

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Interruption
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OMFG this dood (Wesley Kimler) on BadatSports is SO damned annoying. Im not sure if its his accent or sanctimonious self aggrandising/advertising and complete and total hostile takeover of BAS but whatever it is... im glad i have the power of Volume. of course i really only listen to BAS for Duncans velvet/dulcet tones... o they stroke my tympanic membranes in such delectable ways. o ya heres a link for BAS Click HERE
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Sorry about that...hes droning on in the background as i type here. Im looking for razorblades... i swear to god.

O ya... so anyways.. the tate... nice... kool prints for sale... interesting take on local art history... even celebrates it... but it seems like a... half assed attempt at a 'Tate'. Ok heres a contrast for you... i went to a tourist trap a day later... the Poldark Mines... its a Mine... deep dark wet and cold... kinda scary and forces you to confront all sorts of inner issues and for some, Bat fetishes. The gift shop? a joke... most of the stuff on sale had a layer of dust deeper than my stubble is long. Shiddy nickknacks, fossils, tin ingots and personalized plastic 'nonspill' coffee mugs... not a whole fecking lot else. BUT the £7 entry fee... MORE than made up by the experience of being 130 feet below bedrock and the water table, standing on a rusty gantry above a black hole (depth unknown) that flooded a hundred years ago. Pumps and gushing and water trickling somewhere around the corner... and the knowledge a mine 20 yards to the left through the rock wall is flooded to about 50 feet above my head and they dont know how close the nearest shaft is to where we are standing... and they are still digging in a rather worrisome random way.

The Tate St Ives on the other hand... is like a poor facade of art and architecture made to support and house the Gift Shop. Its a really great gift shop... i mean it... i wanted so many things and had to be so so so so careful... after resisting the temptation to buy a reprint of a Hepworth Etching on my credit card i could easily refuse a new edition of The Shock of the New.

But please dont let me dissuade you from the St Ives tate, it is lovely. But more like a bastard runaway redheaded stepchild of the Tate Modern and the Tate Britain. Still a 'tate' but not quite worthy the full title in a Saatchi-esque way.

I had more fun at the bottom of a mineshaft though... but mebbe thats just me.

The hepworth museum and gardens though? So gorgeous. So so so gorgeous. In a mausoleum sort of way. Each piece is a beauty, but somehow, the entire place has a graveyard feel. Her kitchen space converted into a timeline of her life in sepia photos, her living room a gallery mixed with some original furniture... a nook has a partially carved 4 foot wooden block, chisle laid to rest as though she has simply stepped out for a pint of milk. In some ways the entire place is like one of those parents who lost a child and couldnt quite move on, they leave the room exactly as it was when their child last lived, and it remains as a shrine. The hepworth gardens are a shrine to one of the last great British artists.

Almost EVERYTHING else in this country, in fact large tracts of the country itself, is a memorial/mausoleum/shrine to the past or a great Noun from the past. The new has proved to most people as lacklustre and uninteresting. Or at least not covered by either football or Big Brother. Kinda sad eh?

Personally i LOVE graveyards and mausoleums... zombies aside. (most of the reason i like graveyards is zombies) and imagine zombies in the hepworth gardens... 'braaaaaaii*ooo look at the organic qualities of this bronze peice!!!* The gardens are truly lovely koipond and all. Its always nice to stroke that which you have only seen in glossies... what... shutup.

Ok im done... Im going to take Bad at Sports' tagline here and claim in dont know jack, revel in the irresponsiblity of being a vocal audience member instead of a journalist, and just make blanket statements to see if anyone cares.

cheers!!

p

MadcapRecap

2006-06-13T06:44:00.000+01:00

Or something along those lines...

Well i have 1 day left in the great white north... and i must admit... i am sad to go.

But please dont get me wrong, I love my life in the UK... but when it all boils down, i love my fam and mates here in the land of ice and snow. I live a life of torn alliances! Oooo Torn Alliances... sounds like a nice title for a video game that has a 2 page splash in PCGamer but you never actually see on the shelves... ever.

Its a week since the food day. I have done SO much since then... heres my recap.. not necessarily in this order... in fact not at all.

Ive seen 2 movies... Cars and Napoleon Dynamite. Enjoyed both. If you disagree with my enjoyment tough shit.

Spent an amazing day in Banff... for the first time in my adult life i spent a day in banff NOT escorting someone around attempting to woo them with canada. Not that canada needs the help, but I do... Banff is a booster shot for my attempts to import future wives apparently.

Spent way too much time in Malls. Chinook Mall to be precise... and spent a shedload of cash... I am now broke and the month isnt even half over.. yay for me.

Revisted my Uni, and spied out the possibilities of furthering my career! More to come on that little foray.. but im not sure i want to divulge as yet.

Refreshed friendships with people i havent seen in years and remembered why i love them so much. This doesnt include P4J as i didnt actually need to remember.. i already knew i loved him.

Umm... lesse what day is it... *mutter... count fingers..... mutter... stare into space vacantly... mutter* ok... reREvisited same friends to get a double whammy visit in.

O YEAH!!! god i have a shit memory... spent a really great evening with the Tisdale and his very hot wife at a comedy club thing... this was my first time at a comedy club thing and was more than pleased with the faux brick wall and the comics and their shticks. LOVED it. And found a restaurant that is Gluten free. Im not gluten intolerant.. but i know loads of ppl who are.

Then... today... P4J scared the shit outta me with a lovely story about a guy who contracted Allergic Fungal Sinusitis. This particularly freaky story involved some poor fucker who got bread mould in his sinus cavity... and some plucky docs had to cut him up to get it out... and as they scooped deteriorated tissue out of his face they found that it just kept going... soon... the dood had no face... he had a fist sized/shaped hole where his eyes/nose/mouth were... how lovely. Now he breathes via trache... and his wife leads him by the hand. I thought... ya right paj.. you sick fuck... but o no. http://www.emedicine.com/ENT/topic510.htm That isnt a link to the particular case study but does actually document various other ones... *shiver*

NEVER EATING GREEN SPOTTED BREAD EVER AGAIN. EVER.
I dont care how hungry or lazy i feel. Nor will i trust the all consuming fires of my toaster to sterilized the violent penicillan spores.

I also beat the socks off the pajman with the lesyks cheese army. It was both fun and sorta not fun... i dont like making paj pout... he used to pout alot.. hes not pouting alot now... i prefer him nonpouty... and although the grey days of hotboxing camels in a beat up saab are historic.. the bleaks of basement jaxx and minor bouts of starvation are happily put behind me/us. The sneaky smile and eye twinkle I see is so welcome and fuzzy making that i can only smile back and thank the lovely Ms D. whom ive yet to meet.

I also bought socks.

One day left... and then... back to the land of mould and mildew... but this time with my father in tow!! huzzah! and then... later... my mom as well!! it will be nice to have them back at the flat with me... sort of ease me back into my life... and hopefully assisting me with my newfound me'ness. :)

well... umm.. i think im done now... i know theres other stuff... but i reckon that should be saved for another day! as i cant remember it all right now... its lateish. And i get one last run with P4J before 'the lag of the jet 2 - Time goes BACKWARDS'. yay.

cheers!

p

Gastonomic Greatness

2006-06-06T04:48:00.000+01:00

Today was a day that any future food day will have an amazingly hard time to compete with or even play in the same league as today.

Firstly, any future food day would have to have Paj as connoisseur co-captain. Cant beat the man. He has a green tongue. No he hasnt eaten a lot of green popsicles, thats a strange newly coined term that failed to relate to green thumb. BUT i still think it works. And since this is my blog and NOT yours, i can say Green Tongue.

Our gastronomic journey commenced with River Cafe. Both Paj's workplace in the summer and his mecca of food apprenticeship. I was treated and honoured with the Tasting Menu. A rare treat. There were oysters and muscles and scallops and smoked trout and wild caught Salmon and fresh early season asparagus and pork loin and a stellar rissotto and some funky crab salad of goodness and god knows what else. Every.Single.Bite. was an experience. The whole MEAL was an experience. Having a chef put specific thought into each plate and what follows for you personally is something i have never been on the recieving end of and felt quite honored for it. Its on par with an artist making a unique painting, just for you, while you wait. Each course was served with a thoughtful wine to compliment the flavours. I truly havent ever experienced such a feast. Desert was an amazing chocolate icecream/malt with raspberry compote and a side of pecan tart. so much... goodness.

We rolled/staggered/grunted and buzzed away from the restaurant, sated, satisfied and stunned. A walk was needed to be had.

We made our way via foot and train to chinook and took in District B13. A fun action movie of little depth but great feel. True to french style. Dirty, gritty, rough and ready. No fluffy extra crap... just good camera work, good script (most of the time), and the usual save the world whether it deserves it or not drama. Sure the setting had to seriously support the plot and the action had to serve as a distraction from the lack of depth, but in all, its an action movie ppl. Its not making any claims to otherwise. The baddies cant aim and the goodies dont die. Its a tried and true formula and it was tried and worked true in this film too. Go, have fun, dont think, and try to catch the few sneaky moments of cinematic still life that pop up unexpectedly to catch you unawares.

After that we wandered aimlessly more or less. Checkin out the girlies and talkin bout life the universe and everything. I totally realize i am out of sight out of mind of my life in the archipelago but here... for now... nothing is wrong, everything is ok and life doesnt seem all that heavy and depressing. Of course paj is a balm for most ailments, and food of suberb quality helps. I just hope and will strive to bring back some of my joie de vivre that i have here to my home in the UK.

Eventually we found ourselves in kensington in search of sushi. o. my. god. did we find sushi.

Sushi Club in Kensington... the best sushi ive had in so long... cant remember the name of this one roll.. takani... tamaki... tickytockytucktuck.... mangos coconut sushi... so fucking amazing. heaven on the palate. Nice sake... amazing sushi... another great meal... such a day.

We rounded it all off with some kickass gelato (i had the callebeut chocolate and Chicita Banana, and pajman had the coconut and pistacio) sooooooo good soooo creamy. we wandered back downtown and parted at the hilton. We musta covered a good 5 miles today. easy. The dogs are barking.

Tomorrow... the lesyk and some plastic fantastic. I will be pwned. horrifically.

Cheers!!

p

Living Dead

2006-06-01T18:30:00.000+01:00

I am zombie hear me gurgle...

Jetlags well and truly unpleasant. Mind you, this leg of the trip is helluva lot easier than going back. And i have to work the next day when i get back... o joy o fun.

Ya know what? I love blogger an all that.. and it has actually started me writing and enjoying writing... but my one gripe is have no idea what sort of traffic fungus gets... I know i have 3 semi regular readers now... which is lovely... but i would still write even if noone read it... I would probably write more tho... or at least with less restraint. Not that i have much of that... but... well blah.

I wish i could blog from my phone!!! no.. wait no i dont.. i hate texting... and it would be such a long arduous journey down predictive text that i reckon i would be hurling objects, inanimate and otherwise, at passersbye.

O due to recent musings and conversations ive decided to drop ticketyboo from my regular use of words. This will now ONLY be reserved for descriptions of engines running well and possibly in connection with Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. I think i will move onto a new word... honkydory. Similar but different. And has possible racist connotations! Retro words are cool. I may try to bring 'Hum Dinger' back into vogue... trendsetter that i am, i expect to hear Jeremy Clarkson use 'Hum Dinger' to describe the new audi.

Well i went for a very warm and sunny morning walk to starbucks. Sat down with a Rasberry/Rhubarb pastry thing... (tasty but messy) and read some of the collected short stories of Haruki Murakami. Haruki, for those of you who havent heard me laud his praises, is truly laud praiseworthy. Please excuse any types as im on a very peculiar keyboard and things are just barely stuttering along here. Yes, Haruki, the man is a genius. Yes people say 'ooo he/shes a genius!!!' all the time but really, i dont think we truly understand the full meaning of the word. Technically a genius is someone whos iq is over 125 or something. That would mean that most of my friends are geniusi. (geniusi sounds much better than geniuses). I suppose i could lump myself in there too.

But a true genius, the non run of the mill type, the kind of person whos work and mind produce something so incredible and possibly awe-inspiring are so few and far between. In todays society of mass info in record googled time, genius is usually glossed over, blurred out and in general lost. They still do their genius things but our attention span is ever dwindling. I think Haruki has publish around a dozen books... Most of which have been translated. I think i have 2 of them left. And all of them deserve my attention for at least 2 more readings each. Mind you i suppose genius, like beauty, is in the mind of the beholder. One mans genius, especially when it comes to writing i reckon, would be another mans boredom/paperweight.

I would heartily reccomend anything by haruki but ive become slightly tentative on book advice in recent years. Its such a personal experience... a massively insular, immersive, solitary experience. Im starting to think that sharing such an experience, even if by proxy, cheapens it for me. If i tell someone.... 'read this! its great!' and they do and say, 'ya that was nice...'. I realize i am a little too affected by other peoples opinion, but their apparent lack of similar enjoyment/revelation/appreciation/other slashed adjectives of coolness for something that moved me tends to spoil it.

The ONLY reason im lauding haruki now, keeping that last paragraph in mind, returns me to genius. He trys on genres like the rest of us try on clothes. Love stories to sci fi to Biography, politcal treatises, events, and cultural observations, its all there. Whatever your literary taste... im pretty sure he can write anything he pleases. And that pleases me. If it doesnt please you... im sorry.. but dont tell me. :P

Hrmm... i think i will go and find some lunch now, and possibly have a nap infront of the tele.

cheers!

p

And the lag of the jet begins

2006-05-31T07:01:00.000+01:00

Im not entirely certain that its possible to actually begin jet lag before you leave the airport but it really does feel like its setting in. Mind you I think i have only had an hour or 2 of sleep on the crap train that trundled me here like lost baggage.

So here i am on the interweb once again my lovely pravonians. £1 bought me ten minutes of blog time and a quick email check. Its 7 o'fuckingstupid'clock. Im just grumpy cuz i havent had any sleep and i have the post MiccyD's breakfast remorse. You have all done it dont you look at me with those accusing eyes. Yes i saw Biggie Size me. Shush.

Dont have a whole helluva lot of time left but i DO have 2.5 hours to kill here in Gatwick. The airport to end all airports. This is the sort of place i believe Hitchhikers Guide had in mind for the politely chatty doors and spaceships on the tarmak for a 1000 years or whatever. Its a weird world of duty free, coffee and the most uncomfortable chairs known to man. They DO realize that people end up spending a lot of time here in limbo/perguatory land dont they? A few cushy chairs wouldnt break the feckin bank.

I did a few art pieces on airports actually. Pergatory and crossroads and all that. In a place you dont want to be to go someplace else. And in this case the journey is not as important as the destination as the journey is made as uncomfortable as possible. Im passed that work now tho.

But im down to 30seconds so i reckon ill log off...

cheers

p

Bone Weary

2006-05-30T15:24:00.000+01:00

Its a rather dramatic title. Maybe too much so.. but i do actually feel the definition of the word weary right now. Perhaps im just having a bad day out of my 'good days and bad days' but i look around me at the carnage i have wrought and see naught but disarray, clumsiness, and botched attempts at being ... i dunno... real i guess.

I feel clumsy... and altho i am sincere and honest in everything ive got left in me, i think it might be working against me. My problems are my problems and sharing them or leaning on other people isnt always the best of ideas. Those other people also have problems, and perhaps they don't really need me burdoning them even more. Most people have full plates of their own.

Im not sure what i want... but i do know i need this trip to canada. It couldnt come at a better time. Family and friends and distance... from everything.. work, life here... im just gonna check out for a couple weeks. Leave my key at the desk and hope room service puts a mint on my pillow. I'll come back... im fairly certain. Im not about to chuck 5 years away because things arent going ticketyboo... but what i come back to... i hope will be clearer. I need direction, a goal, a plan, a purpose.

Everyone i suppose has periods of lacklustre living. Its natural... twisting in the breeze with no direction or end in sight. Of course these periods end. How they end, not sure, could be out of some action you can take of your own accord... or perhaps fate intervenes and puts something new in your path. Or perhaps you're fated to take action.. blah blah blah. dunno. And WHAT action? new job? new city? new friends? new... newness? i think im gonna get a tatoo. Its stupid and senseless but new and permanent. I could use a concrete decision that has a clear result. Might be refreshing :) And some would say immature. hell im 32... these decisions are usually made in the angsty teen years... i think i missed out on those to a large extent.

well... time for the topic tangent of the day...
Drinking 3 pints of Hobgoblin is a good thing... at 5% its a fun thing... at 1am deciding youre done... and then having a glass of wine... is a bad thing.

cheers

p

Addendum

2006-05-28T23:33:00.000+01:00

Heres a little update to the State of Union Address.

Since my last post I have spoken to Q-tip. And although there is still minor paranoia in the background static, many latent worries and panics were put to rest. I really am my own worst enemy. DAMN my piscies-ness. or however its spelled... its 11:40 and im drunk...

Also since the last post i went to see Xmen3 with Elf. Sitting in a theatre, bag of popcorn, coke and some chocolate... i felt like the old me for the first time in about 6-8 months. Simple happiness in simple things. Although that sounds a bit... 'simple' that is what i strive for.

And since then ive been out and about more than normal by far. My desire to reduce the tummy hasnt been very successful as the real ales seem to be my kryptonite. But good company and good times are a balm ive needed for some time.

Tomorrow i need to meet up with Q-tip and arrange things for when im in Canada.

The elf will be minding the flat and sitting the fish. Bless her... i realized it could be quite a hassle for her well after i asked and she accepted. But she has things in her life that a little hideaway for a week or two would help.

Im off to canada in like 48 hours. I still have to pack... and do all the laundry and make the flat livable before i go. But barring any freaky unforseen events everything should be ticketyboo.

Its late.. im tired and goin to sleep.. nite nite!

p

Every hour on the hour

2006-05-23T09:05:00.000+01:00

Well I thought i would give the world (all 3 of you) an update on the Welfare of the State of Pravo. Sort of like a state of the union address. Only im not a retard like Bush is. (yes this is debatable)

More or less my day consists of getting up, being way to introspective for my own good, at times mumbling to myself on the walk to work, then CATCHING myself mumbling to myself and telling myself off... I have turned into one of those crazies. Well at least I can hold on to my hygiene. Most crazies smell of stale gin and sweat. My gin smell is fresh and i shower.

At work its both good and bad. Its a very very slow time of year. In the mornings i busy myself with the few tasks at hand and write emails/blogs/or msn chatting. The afternoons arent awesome. The deadzone is 3pm. 3pm has recently been discovered as a time displacement hour. That hour is actually on average 3 days long. Its directly in proportion to the inverse log of the hour over the rate of work to idleness ratio. So its slightly different for different people. Fortunate people like Q-tip have VERY busy jobs and I reckon there are times she doesnt even notice 3pm come and go.

Speaking of Q-tip. I worry myself sick over her. We aren't speaking at all. This is both good and bad. Bad because I miss her voice and if something sour comes down the grapevine of shite that seems to invade my life I could just give her a quick call and chat. But its also good i guess. We do need time apart, i have no idea how much time and i reckon that that decision will be up to Q-tip. I just worry that the more time that passes the easier it would be to write eachother out of our lives completely. And that would really really suck. I wont call her because I'm afraid I will hurt her again. The girl has so much on her plate as it is she REALLY doesnt need my interference and usual bunglings to upset her balance.

One of the last few times i called I mentioned something that I intended in a completely different way but was actually so incredibly insensative and STOOPID to say that I am quite ashamed of myself. No matter how i meant it it shouldnt have been said even if it was known. So although im not being very clear to you.. my listening public, I am trying to point out that I seem to be more hinderence than help for Q-tip at this time. I would love to help in some way but perhaps that way is just staying away, i would like it if it wasnt. I dunno. Time will tell i guess. Its the waiting that hurts. And the knowledge that I hurt her.

So back to my union address i guess... evenings are getting better. I have my ups and downs, more downs than ups but I have a few shining friends who rescue me when its gets really bad. I feel bad for them sometimes as they seem to always have to pull me outta some stupid mental pile of shite ive made for myself.

Most of my mental state is filled with a mild panic, a good does of worry and a touch of fear. This is not a pity party but more a way for me to try to verbally nail down whats going on, categorize it and try to deal with it. Im not built for being alone... im pretty sure of that... but i am ALSO in no state to be with anyone. I reckon that being able to be with yourself and have a peace and quiet is the only way you can be with someone else successfully. I used to have that, but its gone now... i can see it peeking around the corners of my mind and dodging away whenever it sees me looking but i can also see it slowly coming back. Again Time. Time time time.

I live very near a church now. Its a lovely church with an amazing graveyard and grounds. But i think the bell ringers are on speed. The clock tower next to the church is also religious in its chiming on the hour every hour. On sundays though the cacophony of noise that bombards the flat is impressively manic. Its like Time lost his keys, is running around the flat, swearing and kicking things to find em as he is getting later and later for an appointment or something.

So, in my evenings i try to occupy my mind with something. Ive been reading alot again which helps. And although im a bit poor i still manage to scrape together a little cash here and there to paint some new models. I dont have internet still which probably would really help me out. Just knowing i can talk to people would help. Sort of a security blanket. Ya its not very mature but then im not feeling all that grown up these days :P

I go to bed around 10 or 11... sometimes later if a good program is on or a chapter wont end. I still sleep on the stupid air mattress as i dont think i will be able to get a bed until i get back from canada.

But for me, i suppose, i can still feel and see the old pravo sitting inside me looking up at me and wondering when im going to get my act together. Its rather reassuring. And when i do my art thats when the old pravo pokes his head up and takes over. Those are the best times for me. I forget the shit and i feel like the old me. So all is not lost! I have hope and still find myself laughing at things.

I dont want this blog to be woe is me thing. Im just being honest with myself really. If i can say here what i feel, and hope to be, then i reckon im just beginning a new 'self-fullfilling prphecy' as they say.

But anyways, it felt good to say this stuff. Im sure you are bored and if you got this far, wow, im not sure if i should thank you or suggest you get a hobby :)

Cheers!!

p

2006-05-19T15:40:00.000+01:00

Ducati GT1000
OMG

this is the bike of my dreams... wet or otherwise.

ComicCon Bristol 2006

2006-05-19T11:55:00.000+01:00

Ok I don't really know what the convention was called but I like my name for it best.

Anyways, the lovely Elf asked me to join her in Bristol for the comic convention. I happily obliged as seeing how I don't have a life something aside from the ordinary is always very welcome. Now I haven't actually collected or even read a traditional comic in years, but the formative years of my life were heavily steeped in the wonderful world of comic books. So I looked forward to a blast from the past! And also performed the role of 'Geek Shield' for Elf. She's cute as a button, and you cant help but wanna put her in your pocket. Unfortunately for her this also means that she is a Geek Electromagnet. Not just your ordinary magnet... an electromagnet... or if there's a neodymium magnet out there stronger... That's Elf... Geeks flock to her like Nerds to C++. Its almost a phenomenon. So I performed the role of dissuader... easily done as most Geeks (myself included here of course) immediately assume a Girl with a dood is taken... especially hot girls.

We shared a lift up with 2 mates of Elf's whom I will fondly dub Crackers and Big Red. These two are totally sound guys and closet fanboys. Big Red was going on a press pass and managed to blag the rest of us in for free! YAY! We got to the convention 45 mins early... which was a bit poo as that meant I didn't have to get up at 630am. arg.

So we basically just walked in... and had the place to ourselves. Not a huge venue really, I would have thought that the one of 2 big conventions in England would have had a larger representation. Dark Horse wasn't even there. But most of what was there was good. It had a decent line up from Tokyo Pop anime and of course boxes and boxes and tables and tables of die-hard classic comics. It was pretty much an old school Con with a peppering of Indy.

Elf and I had pretty much seen everything we wanted to see by the time the doors opened to let in the unwashed masses. Within an hour the temperature climbed 5 degrees and the smell got... thicker. Not a horribly unpleasant smell... but sort of a geek collective smell, mixed with unwashed pillow smell.

Elf and I got bored. Big Red was chasing artists and writers dragging Crackers everywhere. We decided to see who could find the biggest geek of them all. This ended up being reclassified (in my mind at least) into none Cosplay and Cosplay. Here's the biggest geek I could find. There were a few others that were serious Simpsons Androids Dungeon Look-alikes but this dood managed Geek with an uncompromising determination.

After that the Cosplays started showing up. This is when things got both interesting and weirdly surreal. Some people are well... I have no words. Pictures will speak for me...

Yes this is ash from Evil Dead... and he was very excited to be there.

These two were just... well... plasticy... She ended up staying inside for half and hour and then spending the rest of the day outside on a bench. I assume its because all that PVC made her a human oven and sweat factory.

I'm slightly confused by Tennis Boy with anime hair and his entourage. This wasn't helped by the fact that I wasn't sure if Tennis Boy was a boy... or the sex of his entourage... it was creepy.

This guy, fondly monikered '17stone Spiderman', stomped his way around the entire place. And when I say stomped.. I mean it! He didn't walk.. he stomped... like a 6 year old boy gleefully pounding his younger sisters painstakingly modeled Sand Castle with adjoining pony ranch. We could actually feel the floor vibrate with his passing. His costume was basically Spiderman PJ's... with shag carpet glued to the back. The spider logo made of the shag carpet looked like Pixel Art. HUGE squares stuck together that resembled more an alien from the original Space Invaders than the spidey logo.

I'm sorry the pics are blurry and in general crap... we were trying to be sneaky about the shots... Geeks are sensitive to bright light and sudden movement... it was like stalking the elusive Green Banded Mountain Lemur of East Rajikistan. Only we weren't all that worried about being eaten and these people are definitely not on any endangered species list.

We arrived at 9:15am... and left at 6pm. We had a few food breaks in between, which proved both difficult to find and when found... wholly crap. MMmmmmm dodgey Shrimp cocktail packaged sandwiches.

We finished the day with a pint at a bar and returned to exeter shattered. I bought 4 anime comics and Elf bought some new titles. All in all a good day out. The best part was seeing Crackers and Big Red fulfill dreams of meeting Artists they admired and grinning for Britain.

cheers all!

p

Gallery

2006-05-17T12:15:00.000+01:00

This post should be updated semiregularly and a link will be listed on the sidebar for those of you who are mildly interested. Click the pix for larger versions.

Cheers!

p

Undead Bed

The Evil Eye

Squish You're Dead

KitchenScape - Pixellated

KitchenScape - Proof

Game Over

200g of goodness

Equinox Eventuality

Cake

Love/Hate

Ikea Dreams

Cthuthlu Must be Dealt with

Cthulhu Red

Sofa Envy

Anti-Buddha
I Hate Walmart

The Saddest Titan

Fred Inside

I Am Titan, Hear Me Roar

the 9 o clock news

2006-05-11T15:16:00.000+01:00

Well, its that time of year. Work is very slow... so slow, its a crime i get paid. Mind you I am not complaining. The weather is absolutely stunning as well. If i get a suntan from sitting out back and smoking while reading catalogs and Murakami I think they might start to get suspicious!

Its been a turbulent week for me. There was an... 'incident' with Qtip and I. Qtip confided in an online friend and he took it upon himself to act as her knight in shining armour and slagged me off to my friends. This upset me greatly. Definately not something i really need in my life. I eventually spoke to Qtip about it and a lot of the rumours proved unfounded. But the slagging off by online asshole was a legitimate complaint by me and was soon sorted. If only people would actually fuckin talk to me if they have a problem with me instead of others. That way I wont hear it 3rd hand, fuck my own head up and stress and worry so goddamn much about something that never should have happened in the first goddamn place. Still a tad sore about it, can you tell?

So in order to prevent situations like the above i have backed out of Qtips life, changed my route to work so i dont pass her, not calling, nothing. If she needs space shes welcome to it i guess. To be honest it will most likely do me some good too. That and the upcoming visit to Canada!! It will be so nice to get a change of scenery. Old friends, family and Canadian beer. It should be great. And Dad and I might just go to Italy on the leg back to the UK! That should be great :)

Ummm... well im still 'arting' it up actually... A great new idea has come to fruition and I am awaiting my muse in human form to get back to me with advice. I have a feeling i know what hes gonna say though. If this print is successful it could really open up a lovely new area of study for me through my art.

I like the whole Mediator between here and the Otherworld thing... (minus the New Age hokey-ness) that my work seems to convey.

Im slowly coming to terms with my singleness. And actually might be getting to grips with the lonliness as well. My Zen is returning, slowly. But it is returning. The last year has really crushed my spirit looking back now. Im not the same boy i used to be. One could say thats because Ive grown up, but i would disagree. I just lost some of the Joi de Vie that used to vibrate inside me.

I guess although it wasnt a marriage, it was technically a commonlaw relationship that just about made it 3 years. The breakup would really have to be equated to a divorce i suppose. I mean, I dont enter relationships lightly, they are shedloads of work. That work better be friggin worth it. So when i do commit i do my best. Breaking that pretty much broke what i knew as a life.

Looking at the life i have now, its all rather jumbled and fuzzy. Ive been waiting so long for a change that now that i have one... im not entirely sure how to move again. I suppose you could say I have been living a life in Purgatory for the past 10 years... always waiting for someone to get thier stuff together. Granted, I have had my own stuff to get together but I dont mind saying that all in all Im not so bad at that.

They say your surroundings echo your soul, if thats true my soul is looking, temporary and vacant. My flat has a whole lot of very little in it. I did manage to get a free desk off a coworker this week, which immediately became a very good painting desk! Im quite happy with it. And i dont have to sit on the floor and get deadlegs and cranky knees! I still need an extension for some light though.

My bed is still an air mattress. I have contacted the pensions people today but havent heard from them as to the state of affairs of my cashed in pension check. If and when that arrives i will be able to get a real bed! YAY!

Dad might also buy me a nice sofa or something to sit on. Which would practically sort me out for a cozy flat.

wow i cant seem to stop typing.

Moving back to canada. Well, I guess this little holiday might shed some light on that. But for me... I will simply rest in the hands of Fate. Thats becoming easier now that my Zen is back. There is a longshot job back in Calgary, and if Fate wants me there... then thats where I'll be. If not, I am happy where I am. Lonely but happy... i think. Well I WILL be happier. I have my ups and downs.

Im on the Zyban now, been a couple days of it. Perhaps thats bouying my mood a little. Im counting on it to remove the Shakes when i drop the ciggies. It will be nice to save all that money again. And smoking hurts my chest.

Of course quitting one vice means i can start a new one! Hrmm... women or booze... women or booze...

well... I guess i will go now, It seems i have run out of steam... o and just called the pension office... cheque should be here next week! YAY!

cya all

p

Impending Trans-Atlantic Domestic Crossing

2006-04-24T09:35:00.003+01:00

Alo pravoland inhabitants. This is your king.

Guess what? Goin on a royal tour! Looks like the groundwork for a visit to the Great White North is underway! I should be jetting my fat arse over at the end of may... spending 2 weeks chilling and swilling and then another week or 2 back here with my dad. Hes celebrating his 40th anniversery for emmigrating to canada with a nostalgia tour '06. Should be a great time and a good opportunity to spend time with the old codger.

But for those of you who care... looks like may 31-16 ill be in calgary. Im quite excited. I have some clandestine plans to accomplish as well. Firstly blagging that i havent been anywhere and renewing my driving licence and putting my toe in the water that is the job scene at the uni. If i can get a job there that lets me print like i can here i will most likely hop back across the pond. But no guarantees :)

Anyways heres a list of my favorite words (abridged)

Archipelago (dur)
Solipsism
Deploy
Detritus
Perditious
Pedantic
Quagmire
Forthcoming

Anyways.. this was a draft post cuz Blogger was playin silly buggers... and now im going to add to it...

Feeling a bit 'meh' today... its a long weekend.. and i have nothing/noone to do anything with... cept myself... and the way im feeling... myself isnt such good company. Dont pity me though... its just a phase and will pass... just need to shake myself outta it.

I still havent gotten the interweb at home... i really fucking hate broadband ppl and call centres... hate hate hate hate hate hate. ad nauseum. Im allowed to use that word repeatedly. My history as a customer as WELL as actually being an employee in days gone past allows me.

O bought some 40k Tau Pirahnas yesterday. Such lovely models... cant wait to paint em up all perdy like. Might have to pick up an Airbrush to do them justice. Already have the compressor on loan from a friend. It came with an airbrush but i cant get it to work. *shrug*

well... looks like the canada trip is a go. So if anyone reading this wants to hook up let me know. There are some of you who of COURSE wont have a choice. SUSHI! IN LARGE QUANTITIES.

Cthulhu needs to be taken care of

2006-04-20T16:14:00.000+01:00

Equniox Eventuality

2006-04-20T16:13:00.000+01:00

Ikea Dreams

2006-04-19T20:09:00.000+01:00

Equinox Eventuality

2006-03-22T14:38:00.000Z

Its with a heavy heart that i post this.

Last weekend qtip and i agreed to part ways. We decided/acknowledged that we just dont have the ability to make each other happy anymore. Thats a very short and non descriptive statement for the biggest decision of my/our life but there it is. At this time i dont really feel comfortable spilling the sob story out in text like so much chum. But at the very least its as amicable a breakup as I suppose is possible given our history and lives together. There is deep sadness loss and fear floating with the dust in the air of the flat but when it settles i sincerely hope with all i have left to hope with that we are close friends and confidantes.

I hold no delusions that this won't take time and patience. We both still love eachother though. Until i manage to find a place of my own we will have a strange limbo in togetherstill/nottogetheranymore-land. So the sooner I move out the sooner we can both get back to being good friends. Or so I hope. I am going to look at a flat on friday and sincerely hope its lovely and nice with lots of light and big windows.

Heres a tangent for you... i think my sojourne as a hobbit/underground dwelling creature back in canada really did a bit of damage to my psyche. Mind you that entire year my psyche threatened to take leave. Since then I found myself subconsciously actively seeking out big windows to sit in and live with. Not necessarily to look out of although i too enjoy a spot of people watching/perving on hotties, but just to be near light. The flat before the one I am in now (and soon to leave) was light and airy and bright and cheery. This present flat is less so. I find it greyer and it has more shadows. not to mention its colder. So hopefully the new flat will be better.

well thats an update for ya.

p

I plead the 5th

2006-02-17T09:23:00.000Z

erm... well lets just say i am a combination of lazy and a bad person. Its been like 2 months since i tapped thoughts out on here... and for that failing i apologize to my reader...s. Its not that i dont love you all though :)

Lots has happened and nothing has happened since my last post... we had christmas in holland... and i was ill for most of it... and then i was ill for most of january. nothing clinical.. just snot and sneezing and coughing... this winter has been especially hard on most people i know... i think the grey skies and watery eyes have sat on the souls of people like an anti-buddha who cant have enough cake and wont share.

not sure where that mental image came from... but i like it. I picture the anti-buddha as jabba the hut but with floppy ears.

Q-tip an i have had a few rocky roads... and seem to be recovering. We have started to get out more and expand our spheres of existence just a bit further so as to avoid the baleful glare of two person life in a small flat. it seems to be working... q-tip at least has started to confide in friends.

On the negative side i once again have come to the realization that the people i hold closest to my heart are very far away and impossible to replace. Perhaps again its the time of year.

Positive side? well... got another print done... it was a valentines gift but i really liked the print. A simple monoprint on styrofoam pressed by the albion. Lovely result and simple process. An aquaintance of mine has secured a show at the local independent cinema. His work is pretty much line drawings reminiscent of Spiro-Graph from back in the day. Its lovely work... escher-esque. But lacking in substance. This made me think... damn if he can get 20 pieces up.. wtf is wrong with me? so a goal for pravo!

This summer... when the sun is high and the air is clear i will lock myself away in the print studio, surround myself with toxins and print my life away! i am looking forward to it :)

umm... o finally settled on a decent army list for the tau... and slowly but surely building a retinue for my radical inquisitor lord. hrrrrr... he is called Dr. Evil... and has 4 evil servitor henchmen in orange jumpsuits toting heavy bolters. I am still making a familiar and need a mystic model. Once done... ill have 1500 points of daemonhosting randomness of doom.

The new tau are coming soon too... not sure what ill fork the kinko out for but i reckon a skyrays a good bet. and maybe trio of Pirahna(sp)

well other than that... not a lot new... quite tired tho. wait thats not new either.

o both bry an i can play wow at the same time now... borrowed a laptop from work. not sure if thats a good thing or a bad thing.. stigmas aside.

anyways.. i think ill go make some scenery.

cyas!

p

Happy Birthday Pajman

2005-12-09T09:47:00.000Z

Heres my entry for Mike Pagets 2nd annual Birthday Cake Contest. Im more than pleased im giggly sticky happy i won it for the second year running!

The cakes icing says Happy Bday P4J.

Recent Dabblings in MilkShape

2005-12-08T00:20:00.000Z

Eden Project Revisted

2005-11-28T12:23:00.000Z

Last week work allowed me to take a trip to the eden project... expenses paid! Heres a few pics of the greenery.

The Cat with Hands

2005-11-15T12:09:00.000Z

Found this odd and interesting short film. Thought i would share.

The Cat with Hands

Parkinglot Tombstones

2005-11-02T16:57:00.000Z

2:30am Post Cinema Review

Sushi Review

2005-11-02T11:59:00.000Z

On my last summer visit, Paj took me for sushi.

Memories of Downtown

2005-11-01T17:00:00.000Z

Possibly the first in a new series of sketches from memory.
Its been so long since ive been home the memory is losing detail. And filling it in with other weird crap from impressions etc. I thought i would play with that.

cheers!

p

Converted Green Stuff Ethereal

2005-10-30T18:44:00.000Z

This is my first attempt at serious greenstuffing. His lower body is
all modelled out of it. Various other models contributed to his final
shape.

I will use him as a regular ethereal but will prolly make rules up for him.

Im thinking around 70 points. Invulnerable save 3+ and 6" move in assault phase in any direction. Honor blade.

Crashed Pod

2005-10-27T13:46:00.000+01:00

My most recent terrain piece. hope you like!

its bootiful

2005-10-26T10:49:00.000+01:00

I have absolutely no excuses now... what have i done!!!!!

well the albion is finally fully operational and its MINE allllll minnne!!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHA

errrr... heh

2005-09-28T14:27:00.000+01:00

Sometimes i feel guilty for using quick pic posts as excuses for blog entries... its like they are blips on the ECG of my life for the ppl in canada though. as long as theres a pulse im alive.

Im stealing 10 mins right now to do this. its a manic insane crazy week and i have barely enough time to down a couple aspirin and half a sandwich before i run off and bash my head on pillar and post.

Next week will be worse.

Qtip had a bad day today. so tonight, its an official 'do nothing night' with an early bedtime. not a bad idea. im exhausted.

its funny tho.. the crazier things get here the more my brain starts getting arty... perhaps if i go completely bonkers ill become an art genius make billions and be committed to a padded room... Qtip has threatened the padded room in the past... my reply? well as long as it has broadband, sushi and a postbox for mail order GW ill be happy... a conjugal would be nice now and then too.

i miss pajman.

OMG almost forgot!!!

2005-09-26T15:15:00.000+01:00

2005-09-26T11:40:00.000+01:00

The Vespid.... Microwaving your army in 30 seconds flat.

Tau kick ass.

Still Alive

2005-09-20T08:43:00.000+01:00

Oof.

The pa'rentals have left the building. Its been a hectic nonstop month so far. The ireland sortie was fabdabulous! Ill post a pic or 2 when i get them resized. Ireland is gorgeous... Dublin is london minus the smod the dirt and the assholes... plus the guiness and big city feel ive felt lacking in my soul.

I love a country where although they still have boy racers they are mocked instead of honored. Once, a jacked up subaru bass banged passed with racing seats and a muffler fatter than my thigh... pedestrians cat called and mocked with sayings like (imaging cute irish accent) 'Im embarrassed Foor ya!' etc. It was then i fell in love with the place.

Its quiet but alive there. hard to explain and possibly incorrect as well since i only spent a week in the country. But hey i like first impressions.

Since then ive been bombing around the west country seeing relatives with my parents. And dragging Qtip along with me. Shes had a rough ride of it as she was forcibly introduced to various elderly aunts and uncles. Poor thing. HAH she did the same to me a couple Christmases ago so screw her.

Last weekend was the first weekend of nothing doing. So i gamed. WoW took a sizable portion of the weekend as some 'anonymous' people have surmised. Mind you though i have so far successfully managed to moderate my gaming on it.

More importantly ive just about finished modding all my tau! I have imbedded magnets in all the hardpoints of my crisis suits and of course sunk metal in the weapons. I have also made hammerhead/devilfish conversions allowing me to switch between the two with a click of a magnet here and there. So now i just buy hammerheads and get a devilfish free :) So at full count i have 3 hammerheads and one permanent devilfish as it was an Ebay purchase and put together by a monkey... without index fingers... or a frontal lobe.

I should be able to finish off the hardware conversions of the tanks tonight and proceed with further washes to sex them up paint-wise. I have stripped the entire tau army of its old White and yellow theme. it is now Black and Bleached bone... looks pretty good... with a touch of boltgun here and there as accents on the weapons. My challenge now is to properly highlight the suits and firewarriors without making a hashjob of it.

Work is getting busier too. The beginning of the school year is upon us and i have cute little first years wandering around in small groups with that frightened 'im late and gothic architecture scares me' look. I have a few challenges ahead of me as i have 2 new profs to learn how to pander to. THeres only one of me and 4 of them... its gonna be stressful i reckon. But at least its only 13 weeks.

Anyways i guess i should wander... i have to transer a PC across the network and see if my own PC is fixed yet.

Cheers!

p

Long overdue

2005-08-23T09:17:00.000+01:00

Hello internetland,

Sorry for absence. I have been otherwise engaged with Domesticity. Ok domesticity and World of Warcraft. WoW is fun. But at the same time its mundane. I can see the addiction creeping about on the fringes of my sanity... its yellowed eye glares at me with greed and malice. Lucky for me I have been able to kick a few of my addictions (no I never was addicted to heroin ppl... paj and I made that up to make me look hard) recently so i feel the strength of will brewing in my belly to keep the WoW junk requirements at bay.

Artwise... ive made a couple abortive attempts on etchings.... one drypoint that made me angry and wasted a plate... and one soap lift that wouldn't stop lifting. I have a Koichi Kyuno on my wall that inspires and motivates me but at the same time pisses me off because his soap lift on it is ridiculously perfect. the fucker... i even watched him make that plate.

The pa'rentals are coming to visit this weekend and then they are taking me and Qtip on a weeklong excursion to Ireland! As far as the fungus archipelago goes id say that Ireland is the land of rain and beer. Dublin here we come! Im quite looking forward to temple bar and all its groovy arty tourism! I hope its like dartmouth... land of 4 michelins and tourist-art! good food and bad art make for GREAT rants.

I have no idea how long the parents are sticking around for... my mom keeps telling me her itinerary but then it changes... then it changes back... then something else changes... then a level 8 Dire Boar charges me, i take 43 damage and i lose interest in the conversation all together and mutter noncommittal monosyllabic grunts while desperately jumping like a fool online in attempts to flee rabid pork.

Today im very sleepy too. Im not sure why either. I had a series of odd dreams though. In one of them... little tiny baby ferrets the size of... well they started out about an inch long... then they shrunk and were half a fingernail long.... then they decided to bite my hand and burrow into my flesh. Delving like dwarves or... other delving things... and let me tell you... it fethin hurt. i had to pinch my hand where they were burrowing to make them back up and get out of my flesh. the fuckers. I believe there was an angst ridden sexual tension dream as well in the recesses of my nocturnal subconscious. I hate those dreams... My protestant upbringing trained me to be a puritan in dreams alone. Its ridiculous.

Well i guess i will get on with the rest of my day now... not a lot on the schedule but i will attempt to stay awake.

O heres a quckie

cheers!

p

Flash update

2005-08-22T16:59:00.000+01:00

Terrain

2005-08-08T23:01:00.000+01:00

not to mention the Heat.....

2005-08-02T09:58:00.000+01:00

2005-07-14T10:32:00.000+01:00

I present to you... a present! of cake. for b3n.

Back from the Beyond...

2005-07-13T14:12:00.000+01:00

Or at least a visit to celebrate the dearly departed moving on to the beyond.

Funerals... one cant help but be cliche and start to think of ones mortality at them. Good thing I already sorted all that out huh. Otherwise youd get bored and think... ewwwww another maudlin angst/rage against the broken shell of our miserable lives blog. HAH it may be black in color but this blog aint goth.

The funeral was lovely and fitting. As i am finding myself repeating ad nauseum 'It was more of a release than a loss. A relief. It was past its due.' Quote end quote. Cold? perhaps... sometimes these things affect you deeply and others not so much. I wasnt very close to my grandfather nor was he an open man. I missed the last 2 years of his declining health so I didnt have that burden to shed at the grave. Mourning is a rather selfish (albiet necessary) thing. We weep at our own loss. I loved my grandfather but hes better off now.

Obviously i went back to canada for a week. Or perhaps not so obviously if you dont know me. It was a blitz week really. And for those of you in canada who had no idea was in town ... sorry i didnt call or visit or let anyone know, it was a VERY fast visit and it was heavily laden with family duties. I had only a few hours to share with friends.

So the back of my mind was in hyper comparison mode... Great White North Vs The Fungus Archipelago. Its a draw. I love my job here and my love/life is esconced here. I love canada and the life i could have there. Were i to have this job secure in the GWN i would move in an instant. But i dont. And i am happy where i am. The odd and evens balance and i shall remain until one unbalances the other.

theres prolly lots more i could say about the trip. other than gay lurve and cuddles to michael and jesus. it was ace to see you again. your turn this time. Theres a sushi place in plymouth apparently. COME VISIT BITCH. that was my 'SUMMONING'. Seeing as how the summoning i tried in calgary didnt work. this one will.

cheers!

p

My existence reaffirmed

2005-07-01T12:07:00.000+01:00

Hello internetland

Been a week or so since i typed stuff so I reckon its past due eh?
Ooooo been a while since i typed 'eh' or even said it! Thats what happens when you leave the great white north and fester in the land of mould and mildew, you lose your 'eh's' and gain fungus.

Speaking of fungus, i found some remarkable samples around the base of the kitchen tap yesterday. Weekly we (we being Q-tip and I) blitz the house. I hate it. With passion and fury! Not entirely sure why my ire is irrationally aroused to such heights on such occasions. I dont like cleaning, sure, who does, well except for Escan... but shes 'harrrrrrrr-monica!' so she doesnt count. But shes funny to tease. But the whole cleaning thing must somehow stike a deep disturbed chord in the bowels of my psyche that rings 'irrational ire time'. Little vaccuum tubes shunt up and down from that emotional depth carring tiny slips of tightly rolled paper on which is written various curses, mutterings and what Q-tip calls Huffs and Grunts. Sometimes the vaccuum tubes carry actions including 'put cutlery down just a teeny bit to hard so it makes unnecessary clattering noises' and 'slam cupboard door just hard enough to be borderline between an accidental and intentional slamming offence'. Yes my Ire can be scathing! Watch out!!

I really like vaccuum tubes. When i was very little our house had one of those ... i have no idea what its proper name was but it was a built in vaccuum system. There were little sockets in the walls of each room that you could plug a hose into and vaccuum the house. No need for a cannister following you around or one of those cumbersome upright models. Just a hole in the wall covered by a plastic door. When you opened said door a great sucking noise would ensue. It was quite a strong ... suck. I remember trying to block the suction and being afraid my hand would disappear down the curved pipe i could glimpse at the back of the hole. Various toys were sacrificed to the god of suction. For quite some time i had no idea where they went. But the fascination with the tubes and suction remains to me today. Even after the mystery was revealed as a cannister unit in the basement plugged into various tubes running the length and breadth of the house.

Later in life i saw Brazil, as any decent film-o-phile would admit, and once again the suction and tubes returned! The message delivery system in offices in the days before email. You would be sitting at your desk minding your own business when.... SHOOMP! a message cylinder would arrive in your tube! Its like the building has organs and guts and nerve pathways! You see snippetts of old movie footage with that sort of system and it never ceases to amaze me. Certain genres aspire to including that kind of thing and i have no idea what sort of genre that is... its used to signify bureaucratic machines of epic proportions usually... such as in 'Brazil' and Monty Pythons 'The meaning of Life'.

I have no idea why i just went on and on about 'shoomp tubes' as i shall now call them, but i did. Deal with it. I think vaccuum tubes should be integrated into our transport system. Just make em bigger... underground tunnels with people carrying tubes shoomping at high speed up and down the country carrying ppl in style comfort and speed. the only problem with that would be geological shift which could compromise the integrity of the vaccuum tunnel itself. I reckon the margin for error would be quite small in a system like that. But if.. i mean WHEN i become dictator of the world that will be the new and cool way of public transport. And it would be free.

Today is friday. This is a good thing. for some reason, every day this week since monday has felt like a friday. That was kind of frustrating. And i was slightly worried that when friday came i might have built it up with such high expectations that it would be a denouément. BUT ive been so busy today that until now it hasnt really sunk in that it is friday. And it is a pleasant surprise :) Yay!

At the moment I'm waiting for a class to end so i can take some class pictures and then i will go home for lunch. And make sure my Eve-Online character is training up properly. After lunch i need to run down to the local print workshop studio thing, hoping they are open, and pick up some paper so i can run a couple etching off. I havent had decent paper for quite some time and it will be such a luxury to be able to soak and print with the right amount of starch and thickness. Watercolor paper tends to bleed horribly. I guess it just goes to show you cant cut corners. blah blah.

Well, o ya!! I got my first anonymous comment poster person today!! I have no idea who it is and it was a NICE comment! I reckon its a hot chick. Why you ask? because i can. They called me sweety, empathised and sounded hot. Thats all it takes for me to think that they are hot. Yes we are talking 'kiddy pool shallow' here. I apparently dont know who they are but they know ppl i know. How cool is this!!! Originally my blog was more or less been a place to vent, and share happenings with the 2 ppl back home who cared about what i was up to. Recently its incorporated a few more choice people to share in my musings. But a Random!! WOO! Well as random as I reckon I will ever get... thats just cool! and weird! Most of the time i imagine one or two ppl I am writing this to and leave it at that. Thier faces in my head with words chosen for their eyes. Now its different! I have no idea how its different but it feels different.

I guess i will wander off now. Take care

p

The Jesus Blog: The Blog According to Jesus

2005-06-29T16:26:00.000+01:00

The Jesus Blog: The Blog According to Jesus

Frickin hilarious!

Minor Catastrophe

2005-06-28T08:58:00.000+01:00

This is the remains of my first successful try at the potters wheel and a simple plate i made. Quite a spectacular mess really. I wish i had a cam in there to watch whatever happened. its funny cuz its so amazingly bad.

2005-06-24T00:55:00.000+01:00

Death by Cuddles.. ok i lie it was a MP3.

But anything to get a leg over.

Camping... its not all pink tents and limp wrists.

2005-05-31T11:19:00.000+01:00

Hello all

Been a while since i actually wrote anything of any substance on here. Mostly pix and art huh? Well we just finished a Bank Holiday Long weekend! Or a long weekend for anyone who isnt in the UK. Since everything in the country shuts down or keeps unpredictable hours on such weekends there is nothing for it but to either leave the country or pitch tent in a field and hope it doest blow away.

We are poor so we voted for the pitch a tent idea. We wandered with the aide of B3n, his girlfriend, Escan and his car up to North Devon near Bideford and pitched tent... at 10pm. So yes it was dark. The mere fact that i had only put this particular tent up once before and then with a sargeant major uberanal rententive woman telling me exactly what not to do and when. So we were a tad confused with the tent. It didnt help that the wind was really starting to pick up. One more thing about the tent. It was huge. sleeps 57 or something. ok actually it sleeps 8 or 12 or something. Its more like 3 tents fused together in a nasty siamese tangle of canvas and spiderleg support poles. For all its girth/size it still managed to go up ok. 43 guyropes later.

So after the obligatory half dozen beers and shuffle around the fire so as to avoid the eye searing campsmoke we decided to hit the sack. Around this time it was 1:30am-ish. Not bad. I was happily fuzzy. Q-tip was trollied. She started on the wine on the way UP to the campsite... in fact i think she and Escan started before we finished packing the car. B3n and I attempted to remain the sober smart ones. That didnt last. Right... the wind. Ok around about this time the wind decided to pick up and make Michael Fish start to sweat(r). Gale force baby! Sleep was constantly blown away with the snapping whipping and general nylon mayhem bashing about our heads. Around 3am our friends tent managed to actually succeed in its bid for freedom, shedding its skeleton only to be foiled by guyropes and collapse in a vaccuum pack way upon its inhabitants. Upon extricating themselves they swore profusely, shook fists at the wind and Poseidon (we were on the coast after all) before retiring to their car and sleeping the sleep of the fucking lucky bastards.

5am rolls around. By this time myself and Qtip are hella tired, hella grumpy and hella sleepless. The wind wasnt a steady wind but a teasing blustery, then nothing wind. Tempting you with silence then blasting your betawaves into oblivion at just the point you were seeing naked girlies and teddiebears cavorting in dreamland. So slightly annoying for myself to say the least. The sun then came up. At this point Qtip and i ceded defeat and decided to find a shower. Now keep in mind we arrived well after dark and this campsite was sprawling over 2 fields and had high viewblocking hedgerows of doom. (dont get me started on hedgerows.. thats a different rant ALLTOGETHER!!!) Qtip and I unwittingly embarked upon the Quest for Hygiene! We journied to and fro hither and thither near and far in search of flowing water of any description. Cow sheds and mysterious building containing farm implements that begged tetanus shots, all inspected and carefully maneuvered around. Soon we came upon the fabled caravan graveyard. Not to be confused with the elephants graveyard. These caravans were in various stages of decay and sunbleachedness. Some refused stalwartly to embrace the death of the mobile habitation and held faded yellowed signs in their milky plexi windows offering their sale. Yellowed crystalized sticky tape long since crumbled and that faded magic marker look only making them look like a particularly poorly dressed corpse fresh from the morgue which recently hired a beauty school dropout.

This strange scene was made all the stranger as the wind couldnt penetrate the weed covered cracked courtyard. A strange stillness seemed to be waiting for vinyl siding to split and drop. As i stared at the sad demeanor of sagging caravans and cracked sunwarped tires Q-tip let out a choked squeal of what I correctly assumed to be glee. The shower. A nondecript outbuilding unmarked and unloved proved to be the elusive chapel to cleanliness. And believe it or not it had an electric shower of decent quality! AND the added bonus of the largest woodlouse i have ever seen. You could easily play golf with it if it could still roll its girth into a ball.

Clothes shed and water steaming we payed obiesence to the god of warmth and cleansing purity. It was only after i stepped out of the shower stall that i looked up and saw Sheilob. The monster spider was sitting in its lair visibly sagging the webbing under its weight. It was hungrily staring at me with its 8 shining eyes. Yes they were frigging shining. There were so friggin big they caught the light from the window. Its mandible thingies were moving up and down like it was chewing something/one it had recently caught. Sure mebbe I am being melodramatic here but this spider was freaking huge. Biggest one ive seen yet of the domestic variety. Tarantulas dont count. I ducked my head and dressed quickly warning Q-tip of her near brush with death. Q-tips hair is a spider luxury apartment dreamhome. We quickly fled the lair of sheilob and retreated to our sagging windblown tent of stoopid. I crawled back into the sleeping bag and prayed for sleep while Qtip started a new quest for fire for her coffee. 4 hours later everyone sort of got up and started pretending we were sentient. Qtip still hadnt found fire. And Qtip with no sleep and no coffee is scarier than sheilob. B3n saved us all with a lighter from the locked car. the locked car i dreamed was unlocked so i could sleep in it in peace and quiet... all night. Not long after coffee Qtip and escan decided to start the revolution of 'girls think camping sux alot and want to go home'. Basically it was a peaceful revolution consisting of a lot of snide comments, sarcasm, minor bitchiness, and attempts at Grand Theft Auto (the crime not the game). They won. I was secretly supplying them weapons like the states and the pakistanis as i longed for my bed and paintbrushes. But on the surface i supported B3n as hes my mate and I wouldnt do anyting to undermine his determination to enjoy himself at all costs even if it might mean a homicidal rage and decapitations. I love b3n.

We packed the tent in record time even with the gale force winds. And proceded to wander around north devon in remarkable display of indecision. Or so it seemed. I didnt mind so much as i managed to doze most of time contented in the front seat of the Beemer. We did stop off in a Chavtown and made fun of the locals. Dont worry we used big words so they couldnt understand.

We got back midafternoon i think. We made BBQ and drank vodka and gin for the rest of the day. I think i recall some Xbox. Ignoring the girls was high on the agenda. Qtip and I went to bed and slept the sleep of the dead. Even more than dead... undead even! without the decay and brain cravings.

The rest of the weekend had glorious weather. Of course. Posiedon is a bastard. Qtip and I managed another bbq and more drink and some movie watching. I didnt really get a lot of painting done though. I wont have my Kroot army ready for the tournament as i reckon i have 30+ kroot to paint and around a dozen to convert. So ill just play a tau/kroot force.

I think ill leave off this post now. My fingers are tired and i have a tuba to find a home for. See ya!!

p

post script.
We borrowed a campstove for the coffee. A butane powered one. Yesterday we returned it to its rightful owners. turns out you dont need a lighter to light it. It does that for ya. HAHAHAHAH 4 HOURS of looking for fire quest for Qtips coffee was UNNECESSARY!!! HAHAHAH! It clicks to firey life all by itself!! HAHAHAHA silly girl. She was even given a demo of how it works before we left. hahahahaahah... whats that you say? why didnt i help her on her firequest? i was sleeping. go away.

2005-05-23T10:21:00.000+01:00

Sarg of the vets

2005-05-23T10:20:00.000+01:00

Beaky Vet sarge.

2005-05-23T10:18:00.001+01:00

More greenstuff and crappy writing. need finer pen.

Updates on the Wargaming paintathon

2005-05-23T10:18:00.000+01:00

PLaying with greenstuff.. first go.

2005-05-16T15:23:00.000+01:00

2005-05-16T14:29:00.000+01:00

Love this. Thanks to scarygoround.com.

2005-05-11T09:59:00.000+01:00

Who the fuck said YOU could come back?

2005-05-11T09:15:00.000+01:00

The bleaks are back. TheBleaks are anti-bhudda

2005-05-06T12:54:00.000+01:00

ooo perdy

Err... well I think Im cool.

2005-05-03T15:32:00.000+01:00

Pretend for a moment, if you will, that this isnt actually so geeky its

borderline wrong... and you will notice how incredibly sexy i am.

Sorry.. heres another..

2005-04-29T14:51:00.000+01:00

Im having way too much fun with this... i have a feeling that that makes me a lesser person.

more terragen

2005-04-29T14:43:00.000+01:00

with a name like terragen i keep seeing genetic runaway dinosaurs.

terragen

2005-04-28T15:04:00.000+01:00

OOO perdy... terragen is fun.

2005-04-27T10:30:00.000+01:00

idunno in its purple version. i like it better i think.

what to do...

2005-04-27T09:36:00.000+01:00

Hello Internetland!

Today I am feeling slightly funny. No not 'Haha' funny, a little more like 'wtf do i do now' funny. I will attempt to delve into the deep dark recesses of my soul to divine the source of my angst... haha ya right, deep and dark? more like wading pool shallow and slightly moody.

Called up the hunter last night for a bit of a gab... its cool cuz when i call him up its like I can pretend im just on the other side of the city and we have both just been busy so theres been no lurve. Course thats not the way it is and i could use his help. He gave me a verbal bitch slapping in probably the most constructive way I've ever had one. Its also slightly unnerving cuz he sees the excuses i make for myself, puts em on stage and throws rotten fruit and cabbages at em.

Somehow he sees something good in my art that i really have a difficult time seeing. I need some pajglasses. He mentioned 'impotent modernism'. I really like that... and i suppose i have played with that idea but never thought about it that way... it just was that way... it wasnt a concept i was aiming to portray but was portrayed anyway. so does that make me an 'impotent modern artist'?... it sorta does fit. Im not sure if i am ashamed to say that or slightly proud in a dirty way. ya your right.. the dirty way.

But what to do with it? i really dont want to go down the 'massive limp phallus'' of doom pictures thing which i probably would given half the chance and then get bored of it and move onto something worse like sacrifices to furniture gods.
If this is a recurring theme in my work then i dont want to milk it dry *snort! thats funny cuz of the importent thing* as will most definately just move on and feel lost again.

At the moment i'm more or less crapping words onto the screen and trying to pick out the peanuts. Theres a lot of verbage here but i think i can see something worth a few more thoughts out of all this.

Of course this shit will kill paj... i can here his voice now and i wish i could smack him.
'*intones whiney voice* but its so hard... and im so lazy... i just wanna play my pooter and wank instead of working on shit for a change'

grrr. i hate it when hes right. bastard.

So once again it comes down to that decision i fantasize about but am too cowardly to really grab hold of. actually commit to making art.

Ill think about it.

m

2005-04-26T12:13:00.000+01:00

This is the Killing Jar. Sorta.

I dunno

2005-04-25T19:46:00.000+01:00

damnit...

2005-04-25T16:27:00.000+01:00

Ok i have cackloads of pics i wanna post but will HELLO and Picasa work for me? no... wank programs.

BUT will wonders never cease we actually have internet at HOME now! Its only been like lesse... jan 16 till.... saturday.. april 23 for them to fuckin figure out the problem. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST THEY ARE ASSHOLES. and i havent had a cigarette since friday.

Nervous Tension

2005-04-21T14:40:00.000+01:00

Yes i know its been a week since i posted. And no i dont have a good reason for not posting. I could blame it on the zyban... but i dont really think its makin me coocoo for cocopops any more.

Nervous tension is building. 2 reasons. Today we may POSSIBLY be getting our sofa in the house. third time lucky eh?

Tomorrow is our quit date for smoking. I hope to fuckin god that the zyban does the trick. So im quite nervous about that. I really wanna quit and so does bry, 250£ a month is freakin ridiculous amount of money to piss away on bad health. whats that... like close to 600 canadian bucks a month... i had jobs that earned less than that in canada a month. I really wanna spend some money on me for a change.

on another note... i stumbled across this group while i was trolling for winamp skins no less... www.client-online.net... Client fuckin rocks. Mebbe pajman has the bling on me but i have betz he hasnt found this one yet. Im sexors incarnate.

l8z

karmic vengeance

2005-04-13T11:17:00.000+01:00

Well a week off is all well and good but when it comes to balancing the karmic scales of laziness vs hard work i think karma should chill. The past week was hell on earth with a Music Conference making me actually RUN. here there and everywhere! it was poo. This week is a Drama Conference. Its more poo as the coordinator couldnt coordinate a pissup in a brewery. So my sloth is being repayed 10fold.

On a lighter note tho i have started the bi monthly attempt to quit smoking. This time tho is rather noteworthy. I have join the smokers equivalent of AA. Support groups are bizarre. The dynamic is completely random. It sheds an interesting light on the addiction of support groups portrayed in Fight Club. I dont care what anyone says i still love that film. The light note mentioned is the fact ive just started my prescription of Zyban. Im not sure but i think the MacMan did the zyban a few years back. Im feeling all rose-colored glasses at the moment. And i have fat hands. Or so it feels. Q-Tip is on the Zyban as well so we are partaking and nonpartaking together. Aint commitment great?

On the plastic side of things ive started making maps for warhammer email games. and i bought a palm sander on the weekend for some DIY. the plastic case it came in is only slightly smaller than a GW miniatures case but only cost 10 quid instead of 30. So its off to the local foam maker dood sometime soon to finally make a carryall for my army of DOOM.

Pajman sorry but i think until this week is over i cant do too much more on the map side of things... i have a resized map (and smaller) but havent got my measurements for the details sorted out yet. Its coming but slowly. And at the moment im too fuzzy to think.

Well i guess ill wander off now and stare at random objects without blinking now.

l8r

a weeks reprieve

2005-04-04T14:47:00.000+01:00

Because i happen to be the luckiest sob i know i got a week off work paid without dippin into the holidays. School closure. the kids go home..i get a week off. yay!

The time was well spent forcing germans to retreat and strategic deployment of kvII tanks to punch holes in Panzer mark IV's. that and a load of painting was done. my army has expanded and soon shall be the terror of... well.. my front room mostly. but beware!! at least in the front room.

The rest of the time was occupied with another Haruki Murakami book that my socalled library finally got on. Kafka on the Shore. I love haruki. its nigh impossible these days to find an author who changes your mindstate at all in the dross of the best seller lists and beyond these days. But haruki never fails. never.

my uncle died of brain cancer last week. And since im here and hes in the great white north i was unable to attend the funeral. I hear it was lovely though and the mayor showed up for it. i guess my uncle was pretty high up on the big wig scale.. heavy hitters where pitchin eulogies. (mangled that analogy nicely i see)

Well... its conference week here in hexheketer uni... so im running around putting out fires and telling foreign guest speakers not to cry. other than that... not a whole hella lot new or diff.

o Q-tip (my partner in crime/life) and i have embarked on incredibly violent sorties every evening about an hour past sundown. slug hunts. she is determined to protect her garden plants and in doing so has overcome her fear of all things slimey. She now walks to an fro in the dark with the light of my camera phone in hand muttering 'die die.. oo a big one... DIE', as she nonchalantly pics up and disposes of slugs and snails in a jar of salt. its really quite macabre. im both afraid and guilty as i have helped her. afraid of her... and guilty for slug murder. sigh.

anyhoo... ill have to wander i guess... laters!

p

HOW COOL IS THIS!!!!

2005-03-17T14:43:00.000Z

2005-03-15T15:10:00.000Z

Virtual Art Concept Image

2005-03-14T16:39:00.000Z

The sexiness knows no bounds... sure the sofa ppl fucked us over >>> AGAIN <<<< but hey i got this very sexy new phone... weee!

2005-03-14T16:30:00.000Z

We have been cursed by the furniture gods. I hate the furniture gods... so much.

2005-03-09T17:00:00.000Z

godzilla hates walmart too